100 Things You Can Say To Irritate A Republican

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Addicting Info does it again. Last time they came up with If you hate taxes, here are 102 things NOT to do. Even though they graciously gave us permission to cross-post, I’d rather tease you and then send you to their place to give them some well-deserved traffic.

This time around, they came up with 100 Things You Can Say To Irritate A Republican. Here are a few, but click on the link for all 100:

If you want to enrage a conservative, I suggest saying the following:

1. A Socialist wrote the Pledge of Allegiance.
2. Jesus healed the sick and helped the poor, for free. [...]
6. The Founding Fathers were liberals.
7. Fascism is a right-wing trait. [...]
10. Reagan raised taxes eleven times as President.
11. Reagan legalized abortion as Governor of California.
12. Nixon created the Environmental Protection Agency.
13. Ronald Reagan supported gun control. [...]
24. Hate is not a Christian virtue. [...]
26. Republicans spend MORE money than Democrats. [...]
29. The Constitution is the law, NOT the Bible.
30. Sharia law doesn’t exist in America.
31. The President is NOT a Muslim.
32. Corporations are NOT people. People are people.
33. Fox News isn’t real news, it’s just a racist, sexist, hateful, right-wing propaganda machine.
34. The Federal Reserve was a Republican idea.
35. Women are equal citizens who deserve equal rights. [...]
37. Abortion is a relevant medical procedure, just ask Rick Santorum.
38. Please use spell check.
39. It’s “pundit”, not “pundint”.
40. Social Security is solvent through 2038. [...]
42. Roe v. Wade was a bipartisan ruling made by a conservative leaning Supreme Court. [...]
45. Barack Obama ordered the killing of Osama Bin Laden. It took him two and half years to do what Bush couldn’t do in eight. [...]
47. 9/11 happened on George W. Bush’s watch, therefore he did NOT keep America safe. [...]
49. Separation of church and state is in the Constitution, it’s called the First Amendment.
50. Muslims are protected by the Constitution, just as much as Christians. [...]
53. America is a nation of immigrants, therefore we are all anchor babies.
54. The white race isn’t disappearing, it’s evolving. [...]
56. Evolution is real.
57. The Earth is 4.54 billion years old, not 6,000.
58. The Founding Fathers did not free the slaves.
59. The Revolution was NOT fought over slavery.
60. Paul Revere warned the Americans, NOT the British.
61. Federal law trumps state law.
62. The Civil War was about slavery, NOT state’s rights.
63. Corporations care more about profits than they do about people.
64. Getting out of a recession requires government spending.
65. Glenn Beck is a nut-job. [...]
67. Republicans don’t want to pay for your birth control, but they want you to pay for their Viagra.
68. Republicans actually NEED Viagra.
69. Fox News is owned by an Australian and has a Saudi prince as an investor.
70. Republicans complain about immigrants taking American jobs, then freely give American jobs to foreigners overseas. [...]
72. Labor unions built this country. [...]
77. Republicans only care about children BEFORE they are born. [...]
82. Churches should stay out of politics, or be taxed. [...]
88. The current corporate tax rate is the lowest in 60 years, so stop whining about it being too high. [...]
98. Republicans say teachers are union thugs, then proceed to rape and mug the entire middle class on behalf of corporations.
99. Republicans think rape isn’t a crime, but miscarriages are.
[...]

Bottom line? If you want to anger a conservative, tell them the truth.

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  • myron2012

    Outstanding list. Hard to pick a favorite. Must send to my right-wing brother-in-law

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1233038796 Scott Bowen

     Why do you insult someone’s intelligence by claiming they hold a certain political philosophy? Don’t you find this childish, arrogant, and counter-productive? I’m tired of this red v. blue crap. Let’s move on and talk about the monetary system, our fucked foreign policy, whether we should ration health care based on the market or government mandates, should we spend more money on space exploration. You waste everyone’s time and help distract from the real issues that effect us. Stop it. I’m serious, because the times are serious. We need to debate based upon ideals and action, not what color you vote for. We’re adults, aren’t we?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1233038796 Scott Bowen

     I’m sorry, are you suggesting that Congress is bipartisan across geographic lines? I live in Alabama and I think slavery is abhorrent, abortion should be legal, weed should be legal, however I don’t really fit with either party. I believe in social and economic freedom. You should have a right to your life and the money you earned. I don’t think someone else should be forced to pay for my medical bills. Now, if someone wants to offer charity, that’s cool. They did it of their own free will. But I don’t agree with taxing someone else to pay for something I need. I have wasted a lot of time and money on having fun throughout life. All that money could have been saved or invested in better insurance. If that’s what I want out of life, medical security, then I should have to work for it simply because I’m the one receiving the benefit. I think it would be similar to slavery to demand that someone work for something that I then take from them. That’s why I don’t understand why people think that just because you’re fiscally conservative, or believe that we shouldn’t take things from others even in the name of ‘the people’, you are labeled heartless. I still think private charity should exist, but I’m not gonna force someone to do something just because I feel like it needs to be done. That’s what you’re doing when you elect someone that is going to raise taxes to fix any problem. I feel like we shouldn’t trust politicians to fix things, because they suck at it usually, they steal money or waste it, and then the power could change hands to someone that will destroy everything that was built up because they are on the ‘other team.’ Instead we should try to solve problems on a community level as private citizens and tell the government to get the fudge out of the way.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Adamiscoolerthanyou Adam Knapp

    I would, but it’s been so hard finding an intelligent and learned conservative!!!

  • just asking

    do you know whats really sad?…..this list is 100% correct ,,,and yet we still have people out there willing to stand behind the GOP, even though they are not rich and have nothing to gain from it…..why?…could somebody tell me that?…

  • Doctor

    Gee, I’m a Republican and a pretty nice guy.  Why would you want to irritate me.  I thought Liberals wanted peace and were supposed to be tolerant of diverse ideas?

  • http://thepoliticalcarnival.net/ GottaLaff

     LOL, and yet you read us. Thank you for your patronage.

  • Lydia777

    I HATE THIS FUCKING SITE!!!! BY PAMELA SMITH

  • Go

    just one slight mistake, 
    Paul Revere didn’t warn anybody, the story appeared later. He was actually tried for cowardice but acquitted 

  • Truth

    applies*. And you must be a conservative, because most of that list is perfectly true. 

  • Den Hickey

     Hmmm, perhaps being intelligent enough to skip two grades, enter an all-black college, and then get into two religious schools.  King was exceptional in the extreme.

  • cosmicowgirl

    then how did MLK get his education?

  • crap list

    half of this list is ignorant bullshit that either applys to both sides, a complete lie, or applys to neither.

  • http://milano.xincontriadulti.it/ Bakeca Milano

     Great idea for a post.

  • http://roma.xincontriadulti.it/ Donne Roma

     Great Article. Thank you.

  • Fyrehed

    Just wondering… but how could a statement that started with “just pulling a number out of my butt” be ‘wrong’? Were you there when he pulled said number out of said crack?
     
    But seriously, when looking over the historical evidence, he’s correct: the debate was overwhelmingly about slavery.