Florida Senate accidentally outlaws sex

Southern Fried Scientist points out bad wording may very well have made bad Florida law. Starting in October, the only Floridians having sex will be those into breaking the law. Oooo, maybe their sex games will include a cop knocking at the door and… Well, never mind.

Hey, if corporations are people, that means they’re also now– ta da!–animals. Then again, if corporations had sex, the offspring would look like this:

Photo by Eric Mesa — Some Rights Reserved

But I digress.

Beastiality, schmeastiality:

An act relating to sexual activities involving animals; creating s. 828.126, F.S.; providing definitions; prohibiting knowing sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal; prohibiting specified related activities; providing penalties; providing that the act does not apply to certain husbandry, conformation judging, and veterinary practices; providing an effective date.

source

Oops.

an·i·mal/ˈanəməl/

Noun: A living organism that feeds on organic matter, typically having specialized sense organs and nervous system and able to respond rapidly to stimuli.

- animals such as spiders
– wild animals adapt badly to a caged life
– humans are the only animals who weep

Please go read the rest. SFS even provides a visual.

H/t: Taegan

Added (h/t: @jodmentum): Rebuttal here. Rebut away, it was already clear what the law intended… but the snarkage stands.