Um, wow. Via.
In one Pennsylvania elementary school, 5-year-old girls in kindergarten who suggest it might be fun to blast bubbles at other 5-year-olds using a small, pink, plastic Hello Kitty bubble blower get suspended.
And that suspension makes it impossible to be accepted into other schools. Because, see, toy bubble-shooters are now evil threatening weapons and tots who want to not-harm other children with a not-harmful, painless, floaty stream of bubbles are now “terrorists.”
Bubbles don’t kill people, people kill people.
A 5-year-old girl was suspended from school earlier this week after she made what the school called a “terrorist threat.“
Her weapon of choice? A small, Hello Kitty automatic bubble blower.
Did I mention that the child didn’t even have the bubbler with her at school?
Did I mention her weapon of choice was a doodad that blows bubbles?
Did I mention that the 5-year-old was ordered to undergo a psychological evaluation?
Guess what the outcome of the evaluation was? You guessed right. The little girl was “deemed normal” and not a threat. Imagine that! She’s as harmless as a little (Hello) Kitty.
But now she’s got a “record” and has been turned down by another school because of her scary terrorist past. Before you know it, there will be drones tracking her and she’ll be on a watch list.
Why, soon there could be a Baby Gitmo at every neighborhood mall (So convenient!) where moms ‘n’ dads can shop to their hearts’ content after paying a visit to their Little Prisoner.
From Sign of the Times Department:
“We don’t know when or if this item will be back in stock.” What? It wasn’t popular enough to bring back? The kiddies and their parents just weren’t that into it? Gee, can’t imagine why.
Maybe because they didn’t include a “Private Interrogation Room Playhouse,” handcuffs, or optional action figures gawking at the potential terrorist when an optional alarm buzzer (batteries not included) sounds when optional metal bomb parts trigger it? They also left out shoe bomb accessories and lawsuit forms.
No wonder it’s wasn’t a big seller.
That’s how many emergency-room visits were made last year by children younger than 15 for toy-related injuries – a sure way to put a damper on Christmas. The visits increased 7.6 percent in 2009 and have risen in each of the past five years, according to the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission. The most common problems were lacerations, contusions and abrasions to a child’s face and head, the agency says.
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