Archive for Tim Scott

SNL VIDEO: The Hagel confirmation hearing we didn't see. The "fellating a donkey" mention might be why we didn't.

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snl fred armisen bernie sanders hagel confirmation committee

Saturday Night Live goes all out and skewers Senate Republicans in an unaired spoof of the grilling Defense Secretary nominee Chuck Hagel got during his confirmation hearings on CSPAN. It was cut from the show at the last minute, but thanks to the Internets, we get to see an SNL Moment of Utterly Inane, and Not Yet Ready for Prime or Late Night Time Hilarity.

We see the GOP bickering, grandstanding, and falling all over themselves to compete over who loves Israel the mostest of all.

Before you know it, they go skidding into full-on SNLvision as John McCain demands to know whether or not Hagel would go on national television and-- wait for it-- "fellate a donkey if the survival of Israel were at stake."

Yes he says that.

but wait there's more

The Republicans then try to outdo each other to prove they would all have oral sex with a donkey-- or maybe a mule, since donkeys might be castrated-- if it meant a secure Israel.

Of course, Lindsey Graham says he'd "do it in a second, but then I grew up on a farm, so..."

And yes, tea bagging made its way into the sketch.

But you haven't lived until you've seen Fred Armisen stifling a laugh while doing his hilarious impression of Senator Bernie Sanders.

snl fred armisen bernie sanders

You're welcome.

Huge h/t: Taegan

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GOP Gov. Haley replaces Sen. DeMint with pro-impeach-Obama, anti-food-stamps-for-kids, anti-union tea partier

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As Jim DeMint takes off for his new Very Important Job at the Heritage Foundation, in swoops Tim Scott, the tea bagger who South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley hand-picked to replace him.

tim scott

Think Progress supplied us with his resumé, and what a resumé it is! Can't get much more right wingy than this:

  • Floated impeaching Obama over the debt ceiling.
  • Proposed a bill to cut off food stamps for entire families if one member went on strike. That includes children.
  • Wanted to spend an unlimited amount of money to display Ten Commandments outside county building.
  • Defended fairness of giving billions in subsidies to Big Oil.
  • Helped slash South Carolina’s HIV/AIDS budget.

But see, it's all good because, see, he's (whispering) black, so that will confirm to the entire world how inclusive the GOP is, see. And by inclusive, I mean they're union busters who believe children are moochers because they want to eat.

Actually, it is a positive to have first black senator from the South since the late 19th century. But unfortunately, his skin color doesn't compensate for or have much bearing on his record.

Scott the Conservative makes his grand entrance into the U.S. Senate as Dems bite their nails over an impending battle to replace departing Senator John Kerry who will likely be our next Secretary of State. Scott Brown is swooning at the very thought, and that would make the tea party even giddier.*

Good times, good times.

let the good times roll

Details of Scott's record are at TP, these were just the bare bones.

*Per Taegan:

President Obama is likely to pick Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) as the next secretary of state but the New York Times reports that the announcement will be delayed, at least until later this week and maybe beyond, because of the Connecticut school shooting and what one official called 'some discomfort' with the idea of Mr. Obama's announcing a national security team in which the top posts are almost exclusively held by white men."

And per The Hill, Michael Dukakis (D) "may be headed back to the political spotlight as he's considered a likely interim replacement for Sen. John Kerry (D-MA)."

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