Archive for sex

Bigots: If You Tout The Bible, Live Up To It

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fire breathing preacher

There's nothing quite like the person who expounds his belief in God then doesn't live up to His rules or teachings. Especially when they tend to be bigots, haters and fearmongers.

The Bible, as we know, is that book of stories and proverbs and is held out as the ONLY way evangelicals believe the world should be run. Okay, if that's your belief, our Constitution says you can have the belief -- but you can't have it any more than those who believe otherwise.

So for starters, let's get something straight. God did not write the bible.

That's right, God did not write the bible. Men wrote the bible -- and where these fables come from is quite a basis of conjecture. Google "who wrote the bible" and nowhere, not one source attributes the writing of this holy book to God Himself. Most sources agree with Biblica Encyclopedia:

Many people contributed to the writing of the Bible. Actually, the Bible is a collection of writings from about forty contributors, thirty in the Old Testament and ten in the New Testament. 

Okay, so perhaps God spoke to these mortals who did the writing and they took all of His words down verbatim. But if that's the case, why are there so many versions of the Good Book? And if God is the supreme force and ALWAYS RIGHT, why did he cause his writers to compose the New Testament? Is it to correct the mistakes He made in his first draft or is it to correct the mistakes of mortal men, his ghostwriters (pause) whom he had write his edicts and fables?

From Theology.edu:

These books are traditionally assumed to have been written by Moses, though his authorship is not claimed internally. Since Deuteronomy records the death of Moses, it seems unlikely that he wrote it; certainly he didn't write the part that describes his death. Though some scholars would claim a composite authorship for these books starting around 950 BC with them reaching their final form during the time of Ezra around 500 BC...

So this was an ongoing process. God kept correcting himself or recalling new and more exciting stories -- over a thousand years. Did you ever play the game of 'Telephone'? One person whispers a story to another, that gets passed on to the next person and repeated over and over. Finally, the last person who hears the story has a totally different version of the tale than what was originally told.

That would explain a lot -- but it also casts doubt on those who judge others (isn't there something in the Bible about judging lest ye be judged?) who don't take the literal teachings of the bible as their "gospel."

If you want to see how ridiculous taking the bible literally can be, here's a short video with 14 "sins from the bible" that I bet most evangelicals break multiple times a week, let alone in a lifetime. See how many you've broken in the past 24 hours. My bet is you're damned and going to hell. I'll see you there and I'll have a double whiskey "neat" waiting for you!

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Tucker Carlson Claims Underage Student Rape Depends On Child's Sex

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Sexy Teacher

Okay, I'm a guy. And as a teen, I spent many an hour thinking about sex. A lot of virgins do. And I've heard from many guys my age at that time how much they wished they could experience the pleasures of a woman's company -- nice way of saying going all the way. Actually that's a nice way of saying f**king a hot chick.  We wanted our "cherry" popped, so to speak.

Now one of the "holy grails" of the experience was to"do it" with a woman with curves. To enjoy the anticipated warmth of an ample pair of well-endowed breasts was something that was only enhanced by pictures we got from stolen copies of Playboy or Penthouse. We knew our time would ultimately come, but until then, we just had our imaginations and our right hand to keep us company. And truthfully, that was much safer than the alternative, actually having an encounter.

Every school had one, or if you were lucky, a few young, attractive teachers that were, for lack of a better word, hot. The wet dream fantasy fodder. But in  most cases, the teacher wasn't going to be interested in some pimply faced 15 or 16 year old with raging hormones and not much more to back it up. On that rare occasion you'd hear rumors that some kid "got some" from an older woman, but the truth is it was usually rumors spread to make the kid's popularity rise, if not another part of their anatomy. It was nothing more than fantasy fulfillment -- unless, in those rarest of rare circumstances, "it" happened. Then, as the law likes to call it, it was rape.

Now truthfully, if it was a male teacher and a female student, it was called rape. If it was a female teacher and a male student, it was generally called contributing to the delinquency of a minor. But rape is rape unless you're one of those shallow thinkers like Fox's own, Tucker Carlson, the sexually perverse boy who never grew up. He just got older, but never matured.

tucker carlson

Reported on Raw Story:

Carlson, who has previously  stated that sexual situations between male students with teachers would be, in the student’s mind, “the greatest thing that ever happened,”  said the notion of statutory rape  with a male student defied “common sense.”

Just recently he went on Fox News, his home, and told a panel of female coworkers that not only was a 16 year old boy, who was "enticed" into having sex 30 times in a 6 week span with his young, married female teacher NOT RAPE, but that it was wrong of the boy to report it. Carlson obviously lives in the Mad Hatter world of fantasy. Tucker the F**ker says the real victim of this "escapade" was the female teacher, not the boy student because he got the better of the deal. He got his cherry popped with a hottie.

Outrageous? You bet. But don't take my word for it. Here's Tucker Carlson, twisted fool. His totally sexist view is a boy "getting some" isn't a crime because there's no victim here. And if there is victim here, it's the poor female teacher because she got squealed on.

I wonder if Tucker would feel if when he was 16 he had a teacher who was a male hunk. Let's say this hottie teacher decided to bust Carlson's effeminate ass, taking Carlson's, cherry after school 30 times over a six week period. Should he blame Tucker because maybe it's something he fantasized over? I'm not saying Tucker has those thoughts. I'm just saying, "what if?" Rape is rape. It's about time Carlson took some responsibility for what he says to the public.

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Imagine: Ignorance In Idaho Has A Happy Ending

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ignorance

In 2007, author Sherman Alexie's book, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian won the National Book Award for Young People's Literature. That's high praise indeed. Yet this semi-autobigraphical novel describing growing up on a Spokane Indian Reservation while attending an all-white secondary school, has ridden into some difficulty recently in Meridian, Idaho.

A few weeks ago, the school board voted 2-1 to ban the book because it contained sexually charged material and mocked the Christian religion. It's not particularly clear which was more offensive to the school board, the "steam" of the material or the "passion" of the Christ. But none the less, banned it became.

Literature might have been knocked to the mat, but it wasn't out for the count.

The Raw Story:

Following the ban, two Washington women held a crowd-sourced fundraiser to purchase copies of the book to distribute to the 350 students who had signed the petition protesting the board’s move. Working with a Boise bookstore, the women were able to purchase enough copies for all of the students with the publisher donating an additional 350 copies to be given away at a later date.

And give them away they did. It was in a public park this past weekend. Well, until a concerned citizen called the police. They came to see what was going on. It seems Junior Mountain View High school student Brady Kissel was distributing free copies of the novel to students who had signed a petition protesting the board’s recent decision.

Fortunately for the young people of Meridian Idaho, and the rather enlightened understanding of the police in that community, "peace" was kept and sanity restored.

The police spoke to student Brady Kissel and determined no harm was being done. The books were distributed. Literature triumphed over close-minded ignorance. And sanity returned to the sleepy community where education won out. Let's hear it for the police in Meridian Idaho.

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Mid-Day Links

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links

Image:BBC

Living in: The world’s top coffee cities

Three Americans killed in Kabul hospital attack

Is music really all about sex?

Earworms: Why catchy tunes get trapped in our heads

Michigan GOP Candidate Terry Lynn Land: 'Obamacare' Is The Real War On Women

The islands where foxes fly

The Founding Fathers Risked Their Lives so Pastors Could Meddle in Politics?

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CPAC -- Conservatives On (Gay) Cruise Control (NSFW)

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Gay

Nothing like getting out of town and hanging out with the boys to get those conservative juices flowing. And by juices, I mean body fluids. And by boys hanging out with one another, I do mean bedding one another. Oh those sly conservatives. And you thought they were all button-down types. Read on. You, or at least they, will get a "bang" out of this.

How interesting that during the day, the many firebrand keynote speeches talked about everything wrong with this country, blaming everything on Obama -- education, healthcare, Benghazi, education, lack of jobs, the economy, over regulation and the XL Pipeline.

According to coverage on the CPAC convention, the XL Pipeline is actually gay code for eXtra Large Penis.

HUFFPO:

COLLEGE FRESHMAN IN TOWN FOR CPAC - (M4M) - 18

Coming into town Thursday afternoon through Sunday afternoon for a convention and looking to have some fun here. Mostly looking for very hung individuals to mess around with. I have a thing for really big cocks. I can deepthroat anything and love to swallow.

Okay, maybe this was just one guy in the ultra-right wing element who is looking to explore new horizons. An exception, not the rule. One bad apple kind of thing.

CPAC 24 M4M (NSA) M4M (CPAC)

It is that time again and I want to have some NSA [no strings attached] fun after the speeches. I want to fu*k your mouth while I sign you up on the healthcare marketplace. [closet liberal or closet gay] I want you to be the gipper and go down on my jellybeans. I want to be discreet.

Well, maybe two gays slipped through the cracks. After all, if you heard the speeches from the guests so far during the CPAC convention, you'd know that gays are not part of the conservative agenda. If they are anything, they're the entertainment. The naughty entertainment.

CPAC m4m - 43 (National Harbor)

Radical libertarian would like to tie up and abuse proglodyte and leftover journalists. Boys who look like Sally Kohn or Chris Hayes who need to be tied up, slapped around and fu*ked. Also any Rick Santorum supporters in the closet  or younger versions of Lindsay Graham or John McCain. Of if you are just a decent constitutionalist type, we can have regular non-hate sex or a drink. Your place.

These are just three of the volumes of gay sex-seeking personal ads on Craigslist -- dudes just looking for love while the conservatives are in town. Seems like CPAC is quite a freaky annual outing -- and I do mean outing.

But, just so you don't think that the these convention folks are all bigots, there was this ad:

CPAC Head - 34 (DC)

Cpac ad picture

Masculine, super-discreet and clean cut black guy looking to give head to masculine guy in town for CPAC. DDF only. Any race.

In case, like myself, you didn't know what DDF stood for, I looked it up. It means Drug and Disease Free. Good for those ultra conservatives. They really are concerned with healthcare. Just not Obamacare.

I'm sure not all conservatives are freaks. Others are just plain ignorant or in some cases, stupid. But from this HuffPo report, there's certainly lots of partying going on, and from these ads -- this mostly boys club gives new meaning to the expression, "boys will be boys." It's more like boys will be into other boys.

File this under the 'GOP hypocrite files.' These are the same people who fight same sex marriage, pass bills restricting women's right to choose and religious freedom bills designed to be anti-gay bills. Who are they fighting for with their rhetoric? Probably tonight's No Strings Attached anonymous hook-up.

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Addicted To Porn -- Thank God For That

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Porn Addiction
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So, evidently is porn.

Is there really an addiction to porn? Well chances are, if you're religious (any denomination will do) you have a larger chance of having this so called porn addiction. At least in your own eyes.

Psychologists argue over whether sex addiction and porn addiction are really "legitimate illnesses." That's because defining the malady is like trying to decide what is porn is -- it's  a subjective judgment. Over the years we've gone from no limits -- ancient Roman days -- to the Victorian era where even a naked female ankle was considered offensive and could lead to jailing -- to now. In our current Internet era just about anything goes -- no, anything goes.

And with the proliferation of free and immediate access to questionable materials of all extremes, there are those who find that their exposure and need to view it (prurient interests) all the time has become the so-called "porn addiction". People who can't leave their house without viewing these salacious materials. They fill their work breaks with smartphone visits to "adult" sites. And then they can't wait to come home, even skipping the obligatory picking up the milk and bread for the family until they've had their "fix."

Experts in mental health have been doing some research -- yeah, I bet they have -- and are trying to find out how big a mental health issue this has become. And as with most scientific research there are many interpretations and evaluations. What may surprise you is who feels they're "addicted" to porn. According to a recent article in HUFFPO:

Feel like you're addicted to porn? Your religion could have something to do with your answer.

Compared with their less spiritual peers, people who identified as "very religious" were more likely to have a perceived Internet pornography addiction, no matter how much porn they actually consumed, according to a new study.

What seems to be self-evident, in light of any definitive, clinical definition of "addiction to porn" is that judgement of whether or not you have this malady/reliance/need to view is impacted by -- religion. Yup, that's right. Religion, you sinners. Listen up.

First the scientific world (American Psychiatric Association):

Some researchers have proposed that compulsive viewing of Internet pornography could be a subcategory of sex addiction, sometimes called hypersexual disorder. But psychologists have not been able to agree on whether sex addiction (let alone porn addiction) fits the same addiction model that is used to describe people with substance abuse problems, for example. Sex addiction was not recognized in the latest version of the American Psychiatric Association's mental health handbook, the DSM-5, and there is no official diagnosis.

From reading that, it's not a certainty if there really is a diagnosed criteria for even having a sex addiction, let alone a porn addiction. The first -- sex addiction -- seems to be a need to actively participate. The other -- porn addiction -- seems to be a voracious need to ingest lots of pictures and videos. But neither rise to the APA's handbook of scientific ailments. So what's a horny guy/gal gonna do?

To find out whether or not you have it, you must move to another book. The bible. Having been written so long ago, I doubt other than some tales of adultery or wife swapping, you're going to find your answers there. But amazingly, that's the book that seems to be the cause, at least in thinking, of people convinced they have this malady, porn addiction.

"We were surprised that the amount of viewing did not impact the perception of addiction, but strong moral beliefs did," the study's lead author Joshua Grubbs, a doctoral student in psychology at Case Western Reserve University, said in a statement.

So, for any of you readers who sneak a peek every now and then at adult sites, you probably don't have an addiction to porn. If you feel you do, take a look at your religious beliefs. They may be playing tricks on you. So stow away those guilt feelings. You're normal -- at least as far as normal gets. If you weren't, would the Porn Industry look like this?

Brigham Young University:

  • Size of the Industry $57.0 billion world-wide - $12.0 billion US
  • -Adult Videos $20.0 billion
  • -Escort Services $11.0 billion
  • -Magazines $ 7.5 billion
  • -Sex Clubs $ 5.0 billion
  • -Phone Sex $ 4.5 billion
  • -Cable & Pay Per View $ 2.5 billion
  • -Internet $ 2.5 billion
  • -CD-Rom $ 1.5 billion
  • -Novelties $ 1.0 billion
  • -Other $ 1.5 billion
  • Porn revenue is larger than all combined revenues of all professional football, baseball and basketball franchises.
  • US porn revenue exceeds the combined revenues of ABC, CBS, and NBC (6.2 billion)

Those are not numbers that show you're addicted, it shows you're perfectly mainstream. And you're probably not ill, just feeling guilty. If so, you might very well have religion, or dare I say it, God, to blame.

bible imagry

So next time you have the urge to see something thought to be "adult" content, you're just doing what everyone else is doing. And if you think it's wrong, that's your decision. Tip #1, don't Google "dominatrix" or "group sex" or "Wife Beater Illustrated" and expect a family friendly site. But consider those revenue numbers above. They dwarf the donations to the Catholic Church. From Wikipedia:

In 2010, Catholic Charities had revenues of $4.7 billion, $2.9 billion of which came from the US government. Only about $140 million came from donations from diocesan churches. 

So stow away that guilt. The numbers don't lie. We're putting our money where our "privates" really are. Pope Francis is quite a progressive thinker by the church's standards. How much longer until the new Internet interactive bible comes out with a forward by the Pontiff and an optional, adults app. It'll probably include intimate photos of the various sins and in various positions? I can see the updated app including the video of "The A-Salt on Lot's Wife," "The Real Burning Bush," and Leviticus 18:20 -- "How to Commit Adultery -- The Pictorial Handbook." This way you can have your porn and your religious beliefs, all under one swipe. And if you're viewing it at work, just click "escape" and John 3:16 will appear on your screen.

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GOP Right Wing Representatives "Traditional Marriage" Take - Threesomes

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RepublicanMarriageThreesomew398h298

Nobody with an ounce of common sense would say that Rep. Tim Huelskamp (R-Kansas) isn't colorful, if not just plain daft. He's as right wing, conservative and evangelical as it gets. That 'holy trinity' is what stands between him and sanity.

HUFFPO:

Minutes after the House passed a bill raising the debt ceiling, Rep. Tim Huelskamp (R-Kan.) led a group of Republican colleagues to the House floor to stress their support for traditional marriage.

So, the ink wasn't even dry on their vote before Timmy and a few cohorts, familiar names -- Reps. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) and Ted Yoho (R-Fla.) -- felt the next big issue to tackle in Congress after the Republicans failed efforts to once again shut down the government, was to limit something else. The holy sanctity of marriage.

Now they don't really want to limit marriage as much as they want to define it and turn it into -- drum roll please -- all marriages will become threesomes.

(Pause)

While you're letting that sink in, here's the lucky guy they want to join you and your spouse in every marriage union -- to sanctify and make it whole. You must bring another guy into the picture. Who? Who else: "Him."

God

No more one man, one woman marriage. It's threesomes or get out of town. Group sex and only for procreation, that's the Hueskamp ticket. Gotta hand it to these Evangelicals. They're party animals under the covers. Three-ways. You sly dogs.

Huelskamp took to the floor of the House of Representatives boasting his knowledge of history: marriage predates the Civil War. Well, how can anyone argue with that? Of course it does. But his citation of proof goes something like this:

[Huelskamp] stressing how "marriage predates government." He added that the GOP's 1856 party platform warned against the “twin evils of slavery and barbarism,” which he said includes “irregular marriage.”

Irregular marriage is defined by him as any marriage that isn't between a man and a woman and Him. So basically two-person heterosexual marriage and two person same-sex marriage aren't kosher. Not unless they turn them into threesomes.

"It’s just not you and your spouse," Huelskamp said. "There’s a third person in your marriage. And God would like to bless and protect that marriage, and give you many fruitful days ahead.”

Now, perhaps in Kansas threesomes are looked upon as normal, but in Massachusetts, where I grew up, we'd call that and "irregular marriage," probably even kinky, or something out of the Book of Mormon. Either way, that's some statement for Timbo to be tossing around. Do we know if "He" practices safe sex or would it be left to a DNA test to determine who was the real father? I doubt if "He's" shooting blanks.

One thing's for sure -- abortion would be out of the Question. "He" would never approve of that!

So, if you're like me and married, you better start fluffing the extra pillow while you wait around the real "Big Guy" to join the party. I'm not too shy to say, I'm probably going to experience some penis envy, but hey, it's a threesome. I guess yesterday's kinky sex is today's traditional marriage. Just ask Tim.

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