Archive for sarah the quitter

Sarah Palin quits trip to Sudan


Former Half-Gov Quitty McHalfWit is at it again. Let's recap: She quit as governor, she quit her fans, she quit speaking engagements, she quit her well-publicized, self-serving, needy, look-at-me, give-me-attention bus tour (although she denies it), and now she's quitting a trip to Sudan.

At least she excels at something.

(CNN) - Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin canceled a July trip to Sudan due to "scheduling problems," a source with knowledge of the trip confirmed to CNN Thursday. [...]

"She is not going to Sudan due to scheduling problems," said the source, who would not speak on the record because Palin's travel itinerary is considered private.

Palin's representatives refused to comment on the trip.

Quitty has a lot of problems, scheduling being but one of them.


Tuh-weet! Sarah Palin: "Rahm's the smart one... bailing..."


Former Half-Gov Quitty McWashedUp made the usual mistake of allowing her ghost writer (who has honored me with blockage on Twitter) to tweet today:

Leave it to McWashedUp to publicly express bail envy. She's probably wishing she were employed again just so she could get that exquisite Quitter's Rush all over again.

H/t: jazgar


Coming this fall! Sarah Palin's ghost writer authors a new book!


I didn't think there were enough crayons in the world to scratch out a second batch of  babble salad.

Here's my earlier post on the Big Announcement of Wordy McRunOn's exciting new book deal that will make her even more money to splurge on even more bendy straws.

Now we have a release date for Ghost Written: The Sequel:

Sarah Palin's new book has a title, "America By Heart: Reflections on Family, Faith and Flag," and a release date, Nov. 23, publisher HarperCollins announced Tuesday.

Just in time for Christmas... if she doesn't quit first.

"America By Heart". So she had to sit down and memorize the name "America"? She could have just written it on her hand.

It will include "selections from classic and contemporary readings that have moved her," according to HarperCollins, along with "the nation's founding documents to great speeches, sermons, letters, literature and poetry, biography, and even some of her favorite songs and movies." [...]

"The book will also include portraits of some of the extraordinary men and women she admires and who embody her deep love of country, her strong rootedness in faith, and her profound love and appreciation of family," the statement from HarperCollins reads.

Selections that have moved her: Someone must have performed highly dramatic readings for her, because a) She can't read, and b) Nuance isn't her forte.

Even some of her favorite songs and movies: So she included "The Moose Song" and "Annie Get Your Gun"?

As for her next tour, will she quit in the middle of that, too? Leave more fans behind, abandon her groupies, ignore her hangers-on?

The book will have a first printing of 1 million copies. The initial run for "Going Rogue" was 1.5 million...

And by November 24, the price should drop to $4.95.

As with "Going Rogue," Palin will have a collaborator, but there are "no specifics to announce yet"...

And by collaborator, they mean ghost writer. And by no specifics, they mean nobody wants to do it.

But I'm sure, despite all of that, it will be simply inspirational.


Sarah Palin's ghost writer gets another book deal


By GottaLaff

Paging Flubby McSelfServing's ghost writer. There's been a spill in Aisle 2 at HarperCollins:

Publisher HarperCollins announced Wednesday that the former Alaska governor and Republican vice presidential candidate is working on a "celebration of American virtues and strengths."

::waving hand wildly:: Ooo! Pick me! I know! I know an American virtue: We didn't elect Flubby!

Her new work will "include selections from classic and contemporary readings that have inspired her, as well as portraits of some of the extraordinary men and women she admires and who embody her love of country, faith, and family," the publisher's statement reads.

"She will also draw from her personal experience to amplify these timely — and timeless_ themes."

But... how can she draw from nothing? Well, she does have a family. And she does belong to the Mutal Admiration Society with her psycho-phant John Ziegler.

[S]he is currently "gathering ideas and identifying favorite texts and examples."

And by that they mean, she is stealing material, copying and pasting, and calling that "penning a book".

I hope this time around, Flubby allows her ghost writer to sub when she quits before completing her book signings.


Sarah Palin the new Jesse Jackson?


By GottaLaff

Spotlight McWingnut the new Jesse Jackson? I smell a ghostwritten Facebook post coming:

Peter Brown: "Sarah Palin would probably blanch at the comparison, given their widely divergent world views, but these days her political profile looks quite similar to the Rev. Jesse Jackson's just over two decades ago."

"Simply put, the two emerged as political and media celebrities backed by exceptionally strong support within the most ideological wing of their respective political parties. But both also carry substantial political baggage with the much larger numbers of American voters who decide November elections."

Remember all the hubbub and ballyhoo, not to mention the falderol and ruckus, when the Rushpublics accused then-candidate Obama of being nothing more than a superficial, crowd-pleasing celebrity?

Let me see if I can detect any sounds of hubbub and ballyhoo now that Spotlight McWingnut has attained the very same same status....


There is a huge difference between the two of course. Obama had substance as well as style. And he was popular enough to get elected to the highest office in all the land... by a landslide.

Jesse Jackson is an accomplished civil rights activist who's had his share of problems.

Half-Govner Palin quit. And has her share of ethics/honesty problems.

And proved her lack of heft when she resorted to writing crib notes on her palm.

No, she's not the new Jesse Jackson. She's the new punch line.


Hey Dude


By GottaLaff

To the tune of "Hey Jude":

Hey Dude,
You made it worse.
Shared your wife's job
So you both blew it.

The Quitter who took you into her heart
Had a brain fart
And you both knew it, knew it, knew it, knew it!

Nearly 3,000 pages of e-mails "draw a picture of a Palin administration where the governor's husband got involved in a judicial appointment, monitored contract negotiations with public employee unions, received background checks on a corporate CEO, added his approval or disapproval to state board appointments and passed financial information marked 'confidential' from his oil company employer to a state attorney."

First Dude, you and the wife be in a heap o' trouble.

Other revelations from the emails:
  • Palin "coached her staff on how to disguise the amount of electrical work needed at the mansion to hook up her new tanning bed."
  • Palin and her staff "stewed over the refusal of the state Public Safety Department to provide a plane so the children could fly to Todd's family's home in Dillingham."
  • A Palin aide searched for a public event to use as justification -- "I just need one" -- to charge the state for an airplane flight for Palin's daughter.

Palin Gets $100K for Magazine Photo


By GottaLaff

Via Taegan and Gryphen we see how Barbie McLipSchmutz finally quit worrying (yes, yet another thing she quit) about exploiting her kids. Whew! For a minute there, I was worried about all of Babzie's worrying, which was becoming quite worrisome.

How nice for her that she and her daughter can relax and revel in their brand spankin' fat new bank statements:

Sarah Palin and her daughter, Bristol, "earned an eye-popping $100,000 for their new In Touch Weekly cover, "the New York Post reports.

"For just eight hours' work at her own home, Palin pocketed nearly as much as her $125,000-a-year salary as Alaska governor. It seems her decision to quit her political role is making big financial sense. Palin also reportedly earns $100,000 per public-speaking engagement, while she has a multiyear deal as a Fox News Channel analyst. Reps for the magazine and Palin refused to comment on the deal."

Tripp, Trigg, Trak, Truck, Trek, Drek, Heck. They're all just one big happy family living off of their Paris Hiltonesque fame.

All Bristol had to do was give birth and stand next to her mom at conventions and such.

All Barbie had to do was talk about Bristol giving birth, speak in tongues, fail at potential Veepitude, acquire an odd accent that doesn't represent Alaska, talk about her lipstick, forget O'Biden's real last name, incite hatred, have her ghost writer write, and then charge a whole bunch of money for talking incessantly about all of that and other stuff.

The family that exploits together is maladroit together.