When I have a medical problem, I seek out a doctor.
When I have a plumbing problem, I seek out a plumber.
When I have a tax problem, I seek out an accountant.
Crazy, no? So when the world has a scientific problem -- global warming and climate change -- who do we seek out? Scientists?
Hell no. Those lab coat wearing geeks never agree on anything. They're still too hung up on totally unproven theories of things like gravity, radiation is bad for us, and that whopper of whoppers, we're a product of evolution, not creationism. The answers lie not in our stars (sorry Nancy and Ronald Reagan) but in faith-based ideologues who can be trusted. Seers. Prophets. Clairvoyants. We need to seek the truth from our elected officials -- GOP congressmen and GOP senators. If anyone understands ancient history, it's those who still live in it.
According to their right-wing, conservative agenda and their political party planks, we know that even God comes to them for guidance, and not the other way around. These climate guys in the GOP (sorry ladies, you're really only tokens under their tent) aren't like those crazy whacked out communist Democratic liberal egg-heads. Republicans don't waste their time with evidence, facts or even scientific theory. The GOP just plain knows. And when you know something comes from the GOP, that trumps every other form of evidence. Period.
So, grab your bible and your gun, sit down and listen to the real pros. Here's the true geniuses and guardians of our future, all in one video, assuring us we can relax. We're not in any danger. Nothing needs to be done. Phhhw. Damn, those scientists had me scared there for a minute: