Archive for Rafael ‘Ted’ Cruz

Former GOP Sen. Bob Dole: Paul, Rubio, Cruz lack experience; Cruz "way out there."

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bob dole

eating their own

Former Republican Senator Bob Dole thinks Rafael "Ted" "Green Eggs and Ham" Cruz is "an extreme right wing guy" and "way out there." That's an understatement, but okay, we can let it slide just this once. Dole is 90, by the way, so he has a vast number of comparisons to draw from. Why, in HIS day...

And he's right. Recently, Elizabeth Warren quipped that Ted Cruz would have repealed the Declaration of Independence. And even more recently, Cruz said he'd use the confirmation of President Obama's new HHS Secretary to try to overturn Obamacare.

He's all yours, GOP.

The Hill, quoting from an interview Bob Dole had with The Wichita Eagle:

"A number of the younger members, first-termers like Rand Paul, Rubio and that extreme-right-wing guy, Ted Cruz — all running for president now. I don't think they've got enough experience yet," Dole said. [...]

Dole said Cruz is "way out there" on the extremes of the party and defended his own record, calling himself one of President Reagan's top supporters.

That was after Cruz said this:

Ted Cruz:

All of us remember President Dole, and President McCain and President Romney. Now, look, those are good men, they're decent men, but when you don't stand and draw a clear distinction, when you don't stand for principle, Democrats celebrate.

As Rick Perry would say, "Oops."

For more Cruz lunacy, just scroll through our posts here. As for Rand Paul, scroll here for his own brand of WTF.

Meanwhile, as a special bonus, let's talk Paul Ryan. The Black Caucus is challenging him on poverty after he said that poverty is caused largely by a "tailspin of culture," particularly in inner cities, where "generations of men [are] not even thinking about working or learning to value the culture of work."

And don't even get me started on Marco Rubio.

Note: Edited to correct errors.

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Meet The New Sheriff In D.C. Town - Rafael 'Ted' Cruz

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new sheriff

Well, the Texas senator may not officially hold that office, but he holds the power of that office. John Boehner is the Speaker of the House, but in name only -- or SINO for short.

Boehner lost the reins in 2012 when a nationally unknown Texan came riding into town, looking for a showdown at high noon. He was big hat and a bunch of Tea Party cattle. He was determined to make a name for himself by picking off the current big cock of the roost. And Raffy did just that. He picked the weakest, highest ranking Republican, and vowed to make an example of him. He would embarrass the Speaker and bring him to his knees. If successful, Washington, DC would become Raffy's own prairie oyster.

Then it happened. The cocky Texan called out the over-confident Ohioan -- for a showdown at high noon. And flanked with other armed Tea Party proteges, bullies and wildcatters, the showdown on shutting down the entire government took place. And when Speaker Boehner saw Cruz's snipers in trees and peering from behind stately columns, he knew he was in for a battle. The odds weren't in his favor as the Tea Party posse had staked out the best vantage points. Boehner, with more men, knew it was a trap. So he called a truce and caved in to the smaller, but better prepared enemy. He lived to fight another day.

That other day came this past week. Boehner, who thought he could rally his own militia on the immigration battle, took on the Tea Party stared down Cruz, the Texas rambler, and said, "I'll show you. "I'm pushing through immigration reform, but on my terms."

Here's how HuffPo reports on the gunfight:

Cruz may have once again demonstrated his clout with conservative lawmakers in the lower chamber, this time using his sway to quash immigration reform.

House Republicans who supported the "principles" of immigration reform floated by Speaker John Boehner, R-Ohio, late last month grumbled Tuesday that the plan was dead on arrival because Cruz blasted it as "amnesty," spurring a blizzard of negative phone calls to House Republicans. "After that it was 'We'll get back to you on immigration reform,' " said one Republican congressman who declined to be identified.

It turns out that the SINO Sheriff was bluffing, hoping the Texan would back down -- but he didn't. The Battle of Immigration Reform Hill ended before it began. Once outlaw Raffy called it amnesty they both drew. Before Boehner could get his pistol out of his holster, he was winged in the shoulder by rootin' tootin' sharp shootin' Cruz and his Tea Party Pistoliers. 

Showdown

Dripping blood, Johnnie Boy cowered like a coward and handed over the gavel and limped away, aided by his two seemingly loyal deputies, Eric Cantor and the shy, and questionable, Paul Ryan. They joined a deserting posse and fled to the Hill, hoping to regroup.

Much to his surprise, upon making it back to their refugee camp on the edge of the Beltway, Boehner was faced with his internal critics. His own conservative backers were now calling loudly and publicly for his resignation. They want a new sheriff in town. One with balls. They demanded the neutered Boehner step aside.

Much to the House majority's surprise, Cruz said no. The cagey Texan realized that he could stir up problems for townsfolk if he controlled both houses of Congress. He could gum up the works in the Senate and also be puppeteer over the weakened, House Speaker.

Now the tar and feathers are being prepared for SINO Boehner. He'll hold on long enough to keep a scintilla of respect for his legacy - The Speaker Who Caved. His puppet strings are easily manipulated now by the man who truly runs Washington -- Rafael 'Ted' Cruz. Who says that Latinos are lacking a voice in Washington? Hell, right now they own that town.

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New Poe Poem Found And Read Into Congressional Record

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Edgar Allen Poe

I am a bit old school in some areas, especially the arts. I enjoy all kinds of mediums, paint, charcoal, pastels, oils, water colors, stone. I'm especially fond of newer formats -- electronics and innovated creations like holograms and multi-dimensional light imagery. But there is one form of artistic expression where I can lose myself for hours, even days. It's plain old literature.

I read all kinds, from trashy dime story detective novels to considered works of art. I like science fiction as well as historical drama. Young adult fare to epic sweeping romances. Now I'll even let you in on a secret. I also appreciate poetry.

Yes, poetry. Whether an occasional revisit of Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare or the more epic sweeps of Homer's The Iliad or The Odyssey. Narrative or rhyming, poetry means a lot to me.

Recently I heard rumor a long lost poem by Edgar Allan Poe was found and it would be read on the floor on the U.S. Congress. I had read The Raven, Annabelle Lee and others by the master of the macabre but this "new" work wasn't one of the famous -- It was called, Just The Way It Is.

I knew of Poe as such a visionary -- his horrifying, dark imagery. Leonore and The Conqueror Worm.  How excited I was when I heard that a newly discovered work by the master of macabre was going to be read aloud in the Capitol Building, I rushed to listen to it on C-Span1.

Imagine, a lost poem by Poe? Does it get much better that this? By the way, it's rumored to be his last work. Knowing that he died a mysterious death, some say madness, others poisoning, others, that he was killed to keep some secret from being revealed. He was a cryptographer. Maybe this poem would shed some light onto his final demise. Maybe you can find a clue among his last words.

It came on two pages,
It has withstood the ages.
The word "shall,'' is only 10 times mentioned,
But enough to get one's attention.
No taxes did this law raise,
To this day it continues to create much praise;
Two great religions does it claim,
The "Law of the Ten Commandments'' is its name.
A current writing, 1,990 pages long,
Has a socialist philosophy that is all wrong;
Difficult for the people to understand,
And troubling what big government doth demand.
Over 3,445 "shalls'' it does loudly shout,
New massive taxes does it proudly tout;
Written in secret by the bureaucrats,
For exclusive use of the taxacrats.
The Congressional bill called "Health Care Reform,"
Is illusionary, the authors are still ill-informed;
Government ought not take over America's health biz.
And that's just the way it is."

That's it? That piece of drivel is the missing work of one of the literary greats?

Wow. Okay, Pit and the Pendulum and The Telltale Heart it ain't. Actually it ain't even good. It's crap. But I could discount that because, well, Edgar was ill in his final years. Whatever illness he was suffering from, must have been really severe.

Wait a minute. Hold on. Oh no...

I hope you won't be too pissed off at me.

Ted Poe

This poem was written by Poe all right -- but the wrong Poe. This piece of drivel was written and delivered by House Representative Ted Poe (R-Tex.).  No wonder it sucks. Rep. Poe is a Tea Party ally of Rafael Ted Cruz. I hear they're such tight BFF's that Senator Raffy Cruz took the nickname 'Ted' from him, his literary hero.

And this whole speech is about healthcare. The Affordable Care Act. Obamacare.

Okay. Now it all makes sense. Sorry if I confused you. When I heard a poem by Poe was going to be read into the official Congressional record, you could see how I could make that mistake.

Roseanne Roseannadanna

In the words of Roseanne Roseannadanna, "Never mind."

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Rep. Peter King (R-NY): "Cruz is a fraud, he's a false prophet, he's leading us into the valley of death."

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valley of death

Rep. Peter King (R-NY) had a thing or two to say to the Associated Press about a Rafael "Call Me Ted" Cruz thing or two. He's angry and he's not gonna take it any more. Or something.

Not only does he think the GOP shutdown of the government served no purpose (ya think?), but he also expressed his disgust with some in his fellow party members who haven't stood up to Reckless Raffy.

King popped out with this little nugget referring to the repeatedly futile and insane attempts to repeal the Affordable Care Act:

King called on GOP leaders to "denounce him by name, say Ted Cruz is ruining the Republican Party." ...

"I actually went and said, 'This is crazy, Cruz is a fraud, he's a false prophet, he's leading us into the valley of death.'"

Raffy's your guy, Republicans, because, hey, he's a "real leader," right? And he's leading you straight down the toidy (of death).

Enjoy!

flush flush again toilet

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