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WI GOP State Senator not "willing to defend them anymore... There is no massive voter fraud."

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Per The Cap Times, WI GOP State Senator Dale Schultz was on on The Devil’s Advocates radio show discussing voter suppression, specifically bills that cut back on early voting. Schultz's own party, the party o' dirty tricks, has been doing whatever it can to make voting harder, because when turnout is high, it usually translates into Democratic wins.

So of course, rather than fighting for victories in the good old fashioned, all-American, patriotic, apple pie honest way, Republicans resort to cheating, because they know they'd never win by approaching elections, you know, fairly.

Democracy, schmemocracy. Endlessly long, discouraging lines rule!

This isn't the first time WI GOP State Senator Dale Schultz has bucked his own party. See: GOP State Sen. Dale Schultz Slams Walker, Calls Union-Busting "Classic Overreach". Now he's expressing his disdain and distaste for the way they're obstructing Wisconsinites from voting.

Schultz:

“I began this session thinking that there was some lack of faith in our voting process and we maybe needed to address it. But I have come to the conclusion that this is far less noble...

"We are not encouraging voting, we are not making voting easier in any way shape or form by these bills...

"I don't see how you can claim to be improving things by actually reducing hours... but maybe this is Never Never Land, who knows?

"It’s just, I think, sad when a political party — my political party — has so lost faith in its ideas that it’s pouring all of its energy into election mechanics. And again, I’m a guy who understands and appreciates what we should be doing in order to make sure every vote counts, every vote is legitimate. But that fact is, it ought to be abundantly clear to everybody in this state that there is no massive voter fraud.

"The only thing that we do have in this state is we have long lines of people who want to vote. And it seems to me that we should be doing everything we can to make it easier, to help these people get their votes counted. And that we should be pitching as political parties our ideas for improving things in the future, rather than mucking around in the mechanics and making it more confrontational at our voting sites and trying to suppress the vote...

“I am not willing to defend them [his colleagues] anymore. I’m just not and I’m embarrassed by this...

"[Voter suppression is] plain wrong...

"It is all predicated on some belief there is a massive fraud or irregularities, something my colleagues have been hot on the trail of for three years and have failed miserably at demonstrating.”

And that concludes another episode of "Republicans eating their own."

eating their own

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You've reached the "I'm Dreaming of a Black Christmas" support group

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I always open my weekly radio spot on the Nicole Sandler Show at RadioOrNot.com with a little snarky humor in the form of a fake automated voice mail system. Every week I choose a topic to mock, and when Nicole Skypes me, instead of answering "Hello," I respond with, "You've reached..." followed by, "Press One for..., press Two for... etc."  Just like in real life! Only hopefully more entertaining.

Because it's gray and rainy today, because Kobe Bryant is out for another six weeks with a broken knee, and because I'm in an extra crispy crankpot mood, and because I need a break from Very Serious News Items, I thought I'd share today's Press 1, 2, 3 edition to bring a little silliness to the day.

You've reached the “I’m dreaming of a Black Christmas” support group.

Press ONE if you just know Fox News hosts will try to blunt criticism of Megyn Kelly’s recent remarks by saying, “Pfft! This whole silly kerfuffle will all just fall into the White Hole of TV history.”

Press TWO if you anticipated Megyn Kelly gleefully “jesting” about the busiest shopping day of the holiday season referring to it as "White Friday," and then crediting her favorite comedian… the Daily Show’s Lewis White.

Press THREE if you fully expect Megyn Kelly to claim that all piano keys are white, zebras have white and white stripes, that her favorite recording artists are the White-Eyed Peas, and she’ll haul off and give anyone who accuses her of racism... a white eye.

Have a happy holiday!

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AUDIO: Michele Bachmann is twerk-free!

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A few days ago, Paddy posted Video- SNL: We Did Stop (The Government), a strangely entertaining little parody starring "John Boehner" and "Michele Bachmann" (as played by tongue enthusiast Miley Cyrus). They spoofed the GOP shutdown with their version of “We Can’t Stop."

The "real" Michele Bachmann commented about all that and more in a conference call on a conservative talk show hosted by Rusty Humphries. After going into her usual "impeach President Obama" routine, she responded to the SNL sketch.

Via Right Wing Watch:

...Rep. Michele Bachmann of Minnesota suggested that the House hold hearings on impeaching the president. Bachmann said that “impeachment is the stain” on the presidency and “We can have an impeachment hearing in the House and in my mind the President has committed impeachable offenses.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever so anyway blah blah blah...

Bachmann:

“You know, I have a good sense of humor and I never take that personally."

"...The Monday after Saturday Night Live aired, we had a lot of calls in the office, and we had people thought that actually was me in the skit. And let me tell you, as a 57-year-old woman, it’s been a long time since I’ve been confused for a 20 year old.”

“I’ve never done twerking in my life and I don’t intend to take it up.”

Twerk-Free Bachmann? I never thought I'd say these two words to 'Chele, but here I go: Thank you.

H/t: My pal @Anomaly100 at FreakOutNation

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Out of work? Here's an exceptionally funny application for an exceptionally cool job.

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ben wikler venn diagram

Ben Wikler is very cool. If you're not familiar with him, he's funny, smart, and a passionate advocate for all the right things who formerly wrote for The Onion and pre-politician Al Franken ("Ben reminds me of myself when I was his age, except smarter, wiser, more worldly, better read, more passionate, much much taller, and just as funny." – Al Franken)

He also ran the Huffington Post’s humor spin-off, 23/6. And he's worked as an activist, helping run Change.org and Avaaz (he was each organization's Number Two Guy).

Now he’s launching a new podcast and radio show, only a stone's throw from Senator Franken's office. Of course if stones are actually thrown, the Secret Service will be all over him, the show would be shut down, he'd be arrested, and all this would be moot. But I digress.

MoveOn.org is the show's sponsor and partner, and that fun fact pretty much ties everything together as illustrated by the above Venn Diagram.

Which makes you wonder: why don't all job descriptions start with a Venn Diagram?

The show has big plans:

  • We aim to produce a show that will delight millions of people, and inspire them to dedicate their lives to fighting injustice. A show that future historians will credit as the key factor in humanity's unexpected shift towards universal peace, justice, and general awesomeness. In short, a really good podcast. 

Well at least he's not ambitious. Oh, but I kid the Benster.

And now he needs an executive producer. Why, here's the application for the job now!

help wanted now hiring

But how will Wikler know if you're the right candidate? He's got a novel strategy: the job application ends with 65 check boxes that let allow candidates to tell him if they've got what it takes. And it's hard to read through the whole list without laughing loud enough to get weird looks from your co-workers.

Then again, maybe you already get weird looks from your co-workers.

Anyway, applicants are asked to check boxes indicating "I have experience in..."

So! Do you have experience in... ?

  • Producing podcasts
  • Producing live TV
  • Producing The Producers
 He also wants to know about your musical skills:  I have experience in...
  • Writing or recording music
  • Performing music
  • Pretending to enjoy someone else's music for the purpose of a relationship that turned out to be doomed anyway.
 He's curious about your experience in email marketing:  I have experience in... 
  • Writing emails to a big (10k+) list
  • Writing emails to a very big (500k+) list
  • Writing emails to friends complaining about job applications containing ridiculously big (30+ items) lists
 And then at the end, things get a little meta. And then a little beautiful.  I have experience in... 
  • Leaving the box on this line unchecked
  • Learning to make peace with life's paradoxes
 The show plans to launch this fall. Let's hope it's as awesome as its job application forms.
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