Archive for Mike Huckabee

2016 "heating up like eggs on chrome bumper in Death Valley parking lot at high noon in August"

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2016 speculation jon stewart

Another snark-filled guest post by the one, the only Will Durst, who's having a little fun with incendiary partisan politics, the growing GOP vs. Dem hostilities, and possible 2016 presidential candidates. Take it away, Will:

T MINUS 28 MONTHS AND COUNTING

Bust out the gin and tonics because this is shaping up to be one heck of a long hot summer. Weather- wise and politics- wise. All over the world, hostilities are flaring like out of control wildfires. While here at home, it’s the words that have grown from fiery to scalding. And the only way to describe the actions- incendiary.

Impeachment and lawsuits and child immigration are all raging hot topics. The partisan sweltering also includes the 2016 presidential sweepstakes, which is heating up like an egg frying on a chrome bumper in a Death Valley parking lot at high noon in August.

The usual and unusual suspects on the Republican side are spending enough time at the Iowa and New Hampshire Humidity Festivals to qualify as part time mosquito repellent reps and if they aren’t, they should be, because they’re going to need all the extra money they can get. This marathon is going to be as expensive as it will be ugly. And that’s saying something.

Meanwhile, the plot thins. Paul Ryan is busy figuring out how to reinstitute debtors prison. Mike Huckabee is checking the Bible for loopholes. Marco Rubio is taking deodorant baths in order to convincingly deny climate change. In Florida.

And that Rand Paul fellow is simply a feuding fool. He finally patches up a blistering squabble with Chris Christie, then goes and starts a new one with Rick Perry that quickly heats up to Def Con 4 levels with both belligerents spitting like rudely awakened cobras. And no mongoose in sight. Sounds like he just doesn’t like governors.

All this torrid internecine warfare has led party moderates to call for Jeb Bush to get into the race. And he might, but first he has to get mom’s permission. After all, it was Barbara who astutely diagnosed the national fever known as Bush Fatigue.

If the Jeb were elected, that would make the last 5 Presidents: Bush- Clinton- Bush- Obama- Bush. Like a club sandwich. With the Bushes as the white bread. And how apropos is that? This family is whiter than Justin Beiber’s Nova Scotia Fan Club. Like cauliflower and mashed potatoes on a paper plate with a side of leeks white.

Other big money interests are running Romney up the flagpole to see if anybody salutes. But so far: not a lot of looking up. Besides, the former Governor of Massachusetts claims to have no interest. Which pretty much describes the problem with his last campaign.

On the other side, to call Hillary Clinton a prohibitive favorite for the Democrats is like implying that Shar Pei puppies are cute. She’s a virtual lock. Just like she was in 2008.

Her new book, “Hard Choices,” which sounds more like Bill’s handiwork, ends with “The time for another hard choice will come soon enough.” Hmmmm. What could she possibly be talking about there? Picking names for the new grandchild?

The biggest problem for the Democrats is a lack of Hillary alternatives. Even LeBron James has a back up. What if the former First Lady goes on the DL? Karl Rove claims her fall a couple of years ago was responsible for brain damage. And the guy who escorted Dubyah into the Oval Office should be trusted on this. He’s probably familiar with the symptoms.

Copyright ©2014, Will Durst. Will Durst is an award- winning, nationally acclaimed political comic. Go to willdurst.com to find about more about the new documentary film “3 Still Standing,” and a calendar guide to personal appearances including his new one- man show “BoomeRaging: From LSD to OMG.”
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Fvx Nation Is ON The Presidential Lack of Feck - even early of a Saturday

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DejaMoo2_w208h241
They were abuzz with where to fixate blame first … on Obama's Leading From Behind, sanz feck, in the conservative-appropriated Israel and Gaza, or the situation in the Eastern Ukraine that has Hannity et al frothing at the mouth and getting John McCain, Grampy McBombBombs, to share his 'wisdom'; as we reported earlier, yesterday, and in past months, link here for the gamut.

Earlier today, at an ungodly hour, Huckabee expounded on Obama's lack of leadership and had the whole Ick Couch backing him up in a chorale of deck-bemoaning tut-tutting and pooh-poohing.

Poster courtesy our friend Mel Neuhaus, @acehanna54 on the Twitterz

Poster courtesy our friend Mel Neuhaus, @acehanna54 on the Twitterz. Click to enlarge.

Fvx is reporting that Obama is too busy getting manscaped with Putin to be interested, no feck in sight ... so the only debates are about whether he is failing worse in the Mideast or Eastern Ukraine.

 I just don't completely understand when liberals allowed Fox Nation to appropriate Israel -- was there a memo I missed? My blood family is too dull to be Jewish, but adult family/friends have filled in ... when did defending Israel become Fox Noise's and Limpbaugh's job?? Assisted by boobs like these:

mccain-reacts
You have to be sympathetic to the people of Gaza, the regional tragedy ... it's heartbreaking, but the politics in the U.S. have given it such obscurifying and odious undertones, I struggle with knowing how to report on it.
I suspect it all goes to the creepy religionist appropriation of Their Holy Lands for either the Rapture, salacious future ownership or rights to the mythical lands beloved of Their God or could hypothetically contain some location where Jesus slept? It's going to be touristy, if they get their sick Final Days wishes. Shudder.

The Curvy Couch of Ick was fully loaded.

Hasselbeck, Tucker Carlson, The Goodly Governor Huckabee of the evening Fox Noise lineup for failed neo-con GOPpers rescued by Murdoch or Ailes.

Here's the audio, apologies for Fvxing you early.

fox4

'Poking bears' was actually used by Huckabee in what he pitiably felt was a modern analogy.

When they added a Fvx Nation expert, Max Boot, it didn't improve.


For sanity purposes, allow me to add some Melissa Harris-Perry takes on the events that will bring your head back around to the front … and salve some understandable phobias.

And a more global look.

heyputin

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Huckabee on how to treat women: "Place her in the center of the photograph."

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mike huckabee women birth control libido assholeImage via.

Dear Mike Huckabee,

I'm a sucker for good manners. Sadly, they're becoming less commonplace every day. However, old fashioned etiquette is one thing, exploitative showboating is something else entirely.

Yours very truly,

Laffy

The New Republic's interview with Huckabee about how he sees female political opponents went a little something like this:

“I’ve twice run against women opponents, and it’s a very different kind of approach,” he tells me. Different how? “For those of us who have some chivalry left, there’s a level of respect. ... You treat some things as a special treasure; you treat other things as common.” A male opponent is “common,” a woman requires “a sense of pedestal.”

What the hell is a "sense of pedestal"? Anyone?

bueller anyoneMaybe HuckaRelic will put it another way:

“I’ll put it this way,” Huckabee says. “I treat my wife very differently than I treat my chums and my pals. I wouldn’t worry about calling them on Valentine’s Day, opening the door for them, or making sure they were OK.”

Aww, how touching. How caring. How... anachronistic. Women are... special. Delicate. Needy. Require assistance. And clearly congregate in binders. Women shouldn't be treated like "chums and pals." Which means that hanging out at a ball game guzzling beer together (from what my Tee Vee Machine tells me, that's an ultra-chummy guy thing to do) or sharing a Hungry-Man Frozen Dinner is completely out of the question. And don't get me started on tête-à-têtes about Cialis.

(By the way, Huck, some men do call each other on Valentine's Day or check to make sure their significant male other is okay. But that's another post for another day.)

Apparently, HuckaFossil also doesn't feel that women can or want to open their own doors. Now don't get me wrong, I appreciate politeness like nobody's business, and there's a certain charm to conventional "treat her like a lady" behavior. But some of Huckabee's "protective" instincts telegraph less formality and thoughtfulness and more moth-eaten patronizing and moldy condescension.

It gets even worse via another tidbit from Salon:

I believe in equality [!!! huhwha? !!!], and I have a record of transforming that belief into action... However, equality doesn’t mean sameness... I still will invite a lady to go first, will open a door for her, and will place her in the center of the photograph. And yes, I would seek to treat a female opponent with the same respect I give to all women, even though we may disagree on the issues.”

Respect is one thing. Arrogance is quite another. So is hypocrisy. Remember this? "Uncle Sugar" Dems give birth control to women who can't "control their libido" quote?

If the Democrats want to insult women by making them believe that they are helpless without Uncle Sugar coming in and providing for them a prescription each month for birth control because they cannot control their libido or their reproductive system without the help of the government, then so be it. Let us take this discussion all across America because women are far more than the Democrats have played them to be. And women across America need to stand up and say ‘Enough of that nonsense."

That's about as respectful as an Ann Coulter CPAC speech.

Now if you'll excuse me, I simply must step down from my "sense of pedestal." It's cookie-baking time and I need a moment to remove my high heels and don my apron.

respect aretha

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VIDEO- Huckabee: "Uncle Sugar" Dems give birth control to women who can't "control their libido"

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mike huckabee

Here's all you need to know about what Former Arkansas Gov. Mike "Keep 'Em in Their Proper Place" Huckabee thinks of women. This is what he had to say at the Republican National Committee’s Winter Meeting in Washington D.C.:

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

HuckaDino:

If the Democrats want to insult women by making them believe that they are helpless without Uncle Sugar coming in and providing for them a prescription each month for birth control because they cannot control their libido or their reproductive system without the help of the government, then so be it. Let us take this discussion all across America because women are far more than the Democrats have played them to be. And women across America need to stand up and say ‘Enough of that nonsense."

Methinks mayhaps the Huckster is covering for his own, erm, shortcomings.

Feel free to rant for me in Comments. Words fail me. Well, words longer than four letters.

MSNBC:

Huckabee dismissed the notion that the GOP is engaged on a "War on Women," as Democratic rivals allege.

"Our party stands for the recognition  of the equality of women and the capacity of women. That’s not a war on them, it’s a war for them," he said.

How's that outreach thing workin' for ya, GOP?

reinvention my ass

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Big Boobs Do In Mike Huckabee Producer

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large boobs

Yes, you read that headline right. Former Arkansas governor as well as former and possibly future Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee fired his radio show producer over a guest's rather buxom figure. Magic Mike has a problem with talking about the human body. Female breasts, specifically. That's quite an amazing self-indictment made by the Huckster considering he's also a former pastor -- the very person a member of his flock should be able to freely discuss anything with, especially personal issues. Where else would you go for advice if not the solace of your ecumenical leader?

The problem began when the cultural conservative, on his radio talk show, became uncomfortable when one of his show's guests claimed to be victim of a peculiar bit of discrimination. According to this Huckabee interview with POLITICO:

“It was a woman who got fired because she said that her boss thought that her breasts were too big. And I’m not making this up,” Huckabee told Politico. “So I’m sitting there having to interview this woman about her boss thought her breasts were too big.

I’ve had conversations with a lot of people, public and private, but this is just not one I want to have on a national radio show. It was bizarre. It was absolutely the most awkward, uncomfortable conversation I think I’ve probably ever had.”

“That’s one I've tried to forget; unfortunately I’m unable to,” he said of the interview, which he described as “the most awkward, uncomfortable conversation I think I’ve probably ever had.”

Well, as awkward as this may have been for host, it became even more problematic for the radio show's producer.

Huckabee said the guest was scheduled by a producer who “didn’t last very long with the show," suggesting that the interview may have played a part in his short stint.

So there you have it. Mike Huckabee has a thing for big boobs. He's so embarrassed by them and has even fired his show's producer over them.

Putting the outrageous Mike's actions on a back burner -- justifiable firing or not -- is this the kind of person we want handling the reins of the US government? A childish, right-wing nut-job Tea Party wackadoo who can't even discuss a legal matter without tittering ? (yes, that was intentional, I could of used snickering) If he can't discuss an actual discrimination suit, how's he going to govern over the rights of women's reproductive issues? This guy is truly considering running again for president. I can just see his campaign slogan this time around -- "Vote for Mike. A chicken in every pot and two boobs in every bra"

Oh, and this little news piece from today, New Year's Eve day, 2013 -- The Hill is reporting:

Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee (R) leads the field of potential Republican presidential candidates in early-voting South Carolina, according to a new poll from Gravis Marketing.

Doesn't it make you wonder?

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Video- Fox's Huckabee Compares Insurance For Pre-Existing Conditions To Insurance For Burnt-Down House, Totalled Car

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Yeah, exactly the same Mikey. Via MM.

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Video- Mike Huckabee Complains About Tax-Exempt Status of New OFA PAC

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I think Mikey is confused. Via.

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