Archive for John Boehner

"What Obama needs is a Rob Ford, Francois Hollande moment."

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La Cucaracha blame ObamaVia Lalo Alcaraz

Another snark-filled guest post by the one, the only Will Durst, who's having a little fun with the GOP's Obama Derangement Syndrome. Take it away, Will:

STUCK ON STUCK

“Just following the will of the people.” That’s been the GOP rationalization for accomplishing absolutely nothing for five and a half years. Doesn’t matter what the issue is. Immigration. Jobs. Infrastructure. Climate change. Banking reform. The proliferation of substandard dental schools in Nebraska.

According to them, the people want… zip. Zero. Zilch. Nada. And to mask their inaction, Republicans have coordinated a feeding frenzy that would make rabid hyenas jealous.

Something about Obama drives them crazier than chocolate banana fritters with raspberry sprinkles in a bento box. Maybe because he’s the smartest guy in the room and not the least bit shy about sharing that opinion. Maybe he’s the ultimate anti- Bush. Or there’s something about him that looks different. Extremely different. Could be the ears.

What it boils down to is… “Open Season on Obama.” The memos have circulated. The strategy is conspicuous. To derail any possible presidential accomplishment by stalling progress and tossing a continuous slew of dastardly insults onto and at his person. And the mud is flying faster than fingers in a steno pool. Different circus. Same clowns.

John Boehner plans to sue the President. For what? Not even he knows, but you can be sure, the term “smarty pants” will be bandied about. He did drop some tidbit about objecting to the President changing the employer mandate to Obama Care, but that can’t be the source of his irritation, since the GOP insisted on it. It would be like slapping some other family’s child for obeying you.

Dick Cheney called him the Worst President of his lifetime. Which is quite a coincidence, since many argue Dick Cheney was the worst president of Obama’s lifetime. Obama should actually take solace from this charge, since Dick Cheney has been pretty much wrong about pretty much everything since at least 1999.

Sarah Palin called for the POTUS to be impeached. And Sarah Palin demanding punishment of someone for not properly fulfilling an office is another of those “pot with the kettle and the color black” situations the Republicans are so renown. The needle on the irony meter just crazy spun then melted.

Rick Perry accused the President of orchestrating the conspiracy responsible for a deluge of Central American kids crossing the border. And he said it while wearing his new studious looking glasses, so you know he’s serious. Also, the fact he correctly pronounced the word “conspiracy,” is a huge upgrade.

These attacks are perfectly timed to kick the President while he’s down. Right now his approval rating has sunk lower than scorpion- infested, throw- pillows filled with mold spores. Like a tray of hickory smoked baby back ribs at a PETA convention. Tacks in a bath. What Obama needs is a Rob Ford, Francois Hollande moment. A video of him naked, smoking crack with Lindsay Lohan, to go viral.

Republicans even complain Obama is a do- nothing President. With Mitch McConnell stalling every advance in the Senate and the House and Supreme Court lined up against him, it’s a miracle they’re able to get Flag Day commemorations through Congress.

Makes a person worry this political paralysis may be the new normal and we’ll never be able to affect positive change ever again. Instead of the status quo, we got the status no. America has gotten stuck… on stuck.

Copyright ©2014, Will Durst. Will Durst is an award- winning, nationally acclaimed political comic. Go to willdurst.com to find about more about the new documentary film “3 Still Standing,” and a calendar guide to personal appearances including his new one- man show “BoomeRaging: From LSD to OMG.”

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Maher: GOP "Zombie Lies won't stay dead." (VIDEO)

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zombie lies bill maher

On Real Time last night, Bill Maher's rant was a particularly good one, all about how the GOP perpetuates lies. He started out mocking (what else?) politicians in both parties and how they invented their own euphemism for lying: "I misspoke." He then went on to nail Republicans on one of their own rules: "When they get caught in a lie, they don't have to stop telling it," as opposed to Democrats, who are more apt to admit their lies and correct the record. Maher noted that Dems understand that "there's this thing called observable reality." Republican talking points, he continued, "which have been disproven, remain! Like a guest who's been asked to leave a party, but does not! It reminds me of a horror movie where you think you've killed the lie, but it won't stay dead. Which is why I call them "Zombie Lies."

He came up with a whole ballot box full of examples, such as the mythical Obamacare "job killer" (that didn't happen) and "death panels" (there were none), not to mention the big bad "government takeover" of health care (that never materialized). He brought up nearly as many Zombie Lies as the House GOP has ACA repeal bills. He slammed "trickle down" economic policies, fracking, you name it. Watch:

Take it away, Bill Maher:

Finally, New Rule: Now that there's been an uproar over all the neocons who lied about the Iraq war with no consequences, someone must tell me why there isn't a similar uproar over all the Republicans who lied about Obamacare with no consequences.

It's been four years since the bill passed. Has anybody come across even one death panel? The next liberal to tell a Republican "You’re entitled to an opinion but not your own facts" should really just admit they’ve never seen Fox News....

Zombie Lies are neither alive nor dead-- like Dick Cheney...

They pass a Zombie Lie down to dumber and dumber people who believe it more and more...

And when you think the Zombie Lie has finally gone to die at the Idea Hospice of the Absolutely Stupidest People on Earth, there it is being retweeted by Donald Trump.

bam

Big hat tip to Heather over at Crooks and Liars for the video.

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President Obama Finally Chastises the Regressive, Do Nothing GOP

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mytoast

A justifiably agitated President Obama, perhaps feeling freed by the home stretch ahead, finally blew his top about the absurd levels of idiocy being promulgated and phoned in daily by the Do Nothing GOP and their Teabagger fueled un-compassionate conservatism.

Obama rarely uses the Bully Pulpit … but oh, when he does it's a powerful thing. He was the Adult in the Capitol.

Enjoy the highlight quotes and footage, taken from the stellar Obama Scold, a Friday speech in Min-ne-sota, and excerpted from Politico.

 “I might once have said, ‘I want to raise the minimum wage so sue me if I do.’ I just didn’t think they would take me literally,” he said Friday.

gop-lies-big

He also offered congressional Republicans an opportunity to work with him on immigration reform. “You’re mad at me for a broken immigration system? Let’s hold hands” and make progress, he said, before moving to dismiss that possibility.

“They don’t do anything, except block me and call me names,” Obama said.

Ain't that the gawd's honest verity.

“The critics, the cynics in Washington, they’ve written me off more times that I can count,” he said. “Don’t think that we’re not making progress. So yeah, it’s easy to be cynical. In fact, it’s kind of trendy. Cynicism passes for wisdom.”

But, he added, “cynicism doesn’t invent the Internet. Cynicism doesn’t give women the right to vote. Cynicism is a choice — hope is a better choice.”

Fvx predictably called Persident Obama a feckless whiner. I can verify that, take my word for it and move on. But it was first block on MSNBC's Up with Steve Kornacki. Vid below.

bushmeme

It doesn't hurt the presidential angst level that he is, in effect, being sued by Republican leadership in the House. Agent Orange Bo(eh)ner (as a friend calls him), was clearly scared merde-less by Eric Cantor's Fall from the Wall and jumped on the pre-impeachment wagon early.

Dems in the West Wing, and assuredly President Obama himself, has legislative goals for the remainder of his second term, and they may now well be in jeopardy. Wouldn't you be wicked pissed off?

Steve Kornacki of MNBC's Up had the awesome Anna Marie Cox, strategist l. Joy Williams and Russert the Younger on to discuss. Have a gander.


It's not even merely the controversial legislative matters that are stuck in gridlock until the god damned Holy Grail is brought in, the most basic functional government obligations are simply frozen or in some kind of quicksand that ordinary humans have no trouble navigating.

Congress has essentially abandoned ship, SROTUS is handing down Right Wing Nut Job decisions with more fists than an Indian deity and Americans are just a little bit frustrated with Washington as well! Both the House and Senate, under Teabagger pressures and the usual GOP bullheadedness, are eschewing duties left and right.

boehner2

Mostly Right, which is so very, very wrong.

It was high time for a proper scold, and 'good on' President Obama for being the adult in the nation -- and giving it.

Keep Bringing It, President Obama … Yes We Can vote those asshats out!

thanks,obama

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Breaking News: Benghazi Attack Leader Captured By U.S.

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Benghazi attack pic(AFP/Getty Images)

Oh, no. Now what will all those Republican Benghazi conspiracy theorists going to do? WWTGS -- What Will Trey Gowdy Say?

According to the Washington Post:

U.S. Special Operations forces captured one of the suspected ringleaders of the terrorist attacks in Benghazi in a secret raid in Libya over the weekend, the first time one of the accused perpetrators of the 2012 assault has been apprehended, according to U.S. officials.

The officials said Ahmed Abu Khattala was captured Sunday near Benghazi by American troops, working alongside the FBI, following months of planning, and was now in U.S. custody “in a secure location outside Libya.” The officials said there were no casualties in the operation, and that all U.S. personnel involved have safely left Libya.

This looks bad. Bad if you're a Republican who was counting on the Benghazi special congressional committee, the eighth committee to witch-hunt the terrible Libyan tragedy, to find something to tag onto Obama and Hillary Clinton. One of the major talking points is that Obama, who promised right away to seek out and find the culprits, has done nothing since the event nearly two years ago. Nobody had been apprehended. This was a GOP talking point on the lack of interest in the Benghazi attacks and the President's concern.

So much for that asshat argument. Obama said he'd take out Osama Bin Laden. He did. He said he'd bring to justice those responsible for Ambassador Christopher Stevens and three other American deaths in this Benghazi attack, and the round-up has begun.

Now what do you have to say for yourself, Speaker Boehner on your special committee? So Obama's been doing nothing, eh?

What have you been doing? Your job is to run the Congress. Where's the jobs bill, your alternative to the ACA, the long-term unemployment extension, the immigration reform bill, minimum wage increases, etc?

Seems if anyone's asleep at the wheel, it's the House of Representatives. You're the Speaker, Boehner. Maybe you should be doing the people's work like you're being paid for and let the President do his. He's showing results.  You? Not so much. You saw what the conservatives in Virginia's 7th district did to your right hand man, Eric Cantor. Don't think it can't happen to you.

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Political Responsibility Rests On Size Of Your Balls

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Big Balls

The male members in Congress and the Senate are breathing a collective sigh of relief this morning -- at least temporarily. It seems there's a lesson to be learned in a fast breaking story out of Moscow. No, it's not about the Russian movement into the Ukraine. And it's not about a short supply of Stolichnya Vodka. It's about genital governing.

According to the Moscow Times, the newest test to see if you're capable of being held responsible as an adult in Russia is the size of your "man package." Yes, stop your tittering, I'm talking about your balls, your rocks, your nuts. The new test in Russia being used to determined if a man is of "age" is to have his testicles examined to see if they're big enough. I suppose this is an alternative to carbon dating -- or a birth certificate, but those Russians may really be onto something. At least those wimps in Congress hope so. It shrinks down to this, if you don't pack big enough "stones," you're not responsible as an adult. The Moscow Times:

(NEWSER) – In Russia's criminal justice system, size matters. And unfortunately, that means exactly what you think it means. A poor lad named Tomas discovered this after he moved from Ukraine to Moscow to live with his aunt and was soon accused of stealing a cell phone, reports UPI. The kid claims to be 13, but a skeptical court ordered a physical exam that included a look at his private parts. Doctors then estimated his age to be 16 or 17. The distinction matters, because the courts can now treat him as an adult, explains the Moscow Times. A judge promptly threw Tomas in jail.

When this story broke, John Boehner and Mitch McConnell sent out congratulatory memos expressing relief to the members of their caucuses because collectively they don't have the balls of a mosquito when it comes to governing. And using the "Tiny Balls" defense, they can now freely get away with continuing to do nothing in Congress and not being held responsible. Maybe even use that as a re-election slogan: "Re-elect me. I'm a proud member of the small nuts society." I know Lindsay Graham is in the running for chairman of that very committee.

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House conservatives: Say buh-bye to Boehner

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boehner worst speaker ever house conservatives

According to House conservatives, we can wave bye-bye to the current Speaker of the House of Representatives, the one, the only John Boehner. Per The Hill, Boehner's been running around trying to convince everyone that he'll run for Speaker again after the November elections. Apparently, his credibility is shot, because those same House conservatives aren't buying it:

Conservative Reps. Raúl Labrador (R-Idaho) and Matt Salmon (R-Ariz.) told reporters Tuesday that they didn’t believe Boehner would seek another term after the November midterm elections. [...]

The conservatives were asked to respond to a report that Boehner were hatching a plan to punish members who refused to vote for him on the floor in January, two years after a group of conservatives failed in their bid to deny him the 218 votes he needed to win a second term as Speaker.

Twelve members didn't vote for The Boehner for Speaker, including Labrador. Salmon did. In addition, awhile back Rep. Mo Brooks (Ala.) told The Hill he didn't expect Boehner to run this time around.

Boehner insists he has strong support, despite what House conservatives are saying. If only he were good at his job, one might give his opinion some credence. Rachel Maddow reached that conclusion way back in February 2011: Strong indications John Boehner is bad at his job.

And again  in December 2012: VIDEO: "John Boehner is, in fact, bad at his job." Sources say Paul Ryan may replace him.

So will House conservatives be proven right this time? And if so, who will be the next exasperating, anachronistic, white, male GOP speaker?

wait wait don't tell me

I don't want to know

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Boehner tweets pic of Benghazi Committee. So where's the photo of the fundraising letter?

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benghazi committee jon stewart daily show

Republicans are so darned proud of their new Benghazi Committee that they could just burst. They were climbing all over each other to be included. Well, now, thanks to the Twitter Machine, we get to see exactly who won the Big Benghazi Committee Prize:

I tweeted my response: Got a pic of the fundraising letter? Boehner's costly and time-consuming witch hunt at the expense of four dead Americans, highlighting the GOP's blatant disregard for the deaths of four Americans, is appalling. Here are more tweets reacting to his Benghazi!!!! Ad that he'll likely robotically ignore (as he did questions about the fundraising) or never read:

From 2008:

Rep. Lynn Westmoreland (R-GA) is standing by the remarks he made yesterday that the Obamas are part of an “elitist-class…that thinks that they’re uppity.” According to the AP, Westmoreland says that he was unaware that the word was offensive...

Here are a few more Moments of Outrage:

David Spellman left out "exploitation" movie billboard. Moving on:

tv benghazi

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