Yes, it's time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). His comedy blog posts range from political to humorous commentary on pop culture.
For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts, too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc.
A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:
Congratulations to Germany! They have now won 4 World Cup Soccer Championships. But they are still O for 2 in World Wars.
The former POPE, BENEDICT XLI, from Germany and the present POPE, FRANCIS, from Argentina got together at the Vatican last weekend and watched the World Cup final. What a sight. Two POPES praying for their home team to win as they bless the pizza.
POPE FRANCIS is very progressive. Now he's thinking about doing away with celibacy for priests. What's next, "Real Housewives of the Vatican?"
At baseball's All Star Game's Home Run Derby, Oakland's YOENIS CESPEDES won a second straight title by smashing a ball 490 feet on the fly. Unfortunately, the fly was on a guy selling peanuts in the center field bleachers. The poor man still suffers from "Jock Shock."
Speaking of sports. After last week's exciting final match at Wimbledon a new poet laureate was proclaimed. Maybe you've heard of him? -- ALFRED LORD TENNIS-ANYONE.
The border crisis continues and a poll shows the majority of Americans disapprove of how PRESIDENT OBAMA is dealing with immigration. Of course, those numbers could change if we let enough people into the country.
While he was in Cuba last weekend, VLADIMIR PUTIN met with FIDEL CASTRO and promised to revive Cuba's oil industry. Then to seal the bargain. he also promised to fix that other thing that always needs reviving, FIDEL CASTRO.
New Jersey GOV. CHRIS CHRISTIE was in Iowa campaigning at a big cookout. That was like our version of Spain's "Running of the Bulls." Do not get between the Governor and the potato salad.
People who saw the new "Planet of the Apes" movie in 3-D say it's so realistic. After the show, in the front of the theater, they couldn't get three people out of the tree.
Yes, the "Planet of the Apes" is more fun than a barrel of people.
It was raining in New York City almost every day last week and real estate people were making a fortune. The whole city is now beach-front property.
The Statue Of Liberty is wearing galoshes and instead of a torch she's carrying an umbrella.
O.J. celebrated his 67th birthday with some friends in prison. They had a nice little party and out of habit after he cut the cake O.J. hid the knife.