Archive for aliens

Rep. Louie Gohmer Pleads Guilty To Child Sex Trafficking - Implicates White House


Louis Gohmert

According to HuffPo:

...[Congressman Louie Gohmert R-Texas] accused the White House and Congress of being "complicit" in the sex trafficking of undocumented minors on Monday.

So the White House and Congress, if Gohmert's confession is to be believed, are really responsible in the child sex slavery business. What could be more horrendous than child sex abuse?  Furthermore using children for some political gain is shameful. Are you listening, Louie?

car jack

To understand the congressman's accusations, you first have to understand a concept a "Jack" story. Think of an automobile  jack which you used to lift your car to change a tire. Each pump or thrust of the handle jacks up the car a bit higher.

To demonstrate this concept, in case I'm not as clear as I would like, watch this short commercial. It starts with a simple premise, "when your cable company keeps you on hold," and ends up with your dad being punched in the stomach over a can of soup.

Using that "Jack Story" logic of the ad, let's see how soft-brained, dim-witted Rep. Louie Gohmert (R. - Texas) uses that step by step reasoning to bring us to the conclusion that Congress and the White House are ensconced in the child sex slavery business.

It starts with Congress debating immigration reform. From there:

... the debate over comprehensive immigration reform is prompting undocumented minors to enter the United States illegally.

"When legal status and amnesty is talked about here in Washington, it becomes a magnet and draws people in.

"And for all of the children that are drawn in illegally, you know that some get sucked into sex slavery,"

Because of the talk of amnesty in this town and because we do not have a secured border, then this administration, and this Congress also, is complicit in helping lure people into sex trafficking,

Now Rep. Goober, or Gohmert, how can anyone question your logic? So perhaps you'd like to take a leadership role. Be the first congressman to head over to the proper authorities and turn yourself in and plead guilty to child sex trafficking. You've already confessed publicly. Why not do it officially? Don't you owe it to these child victims? To America?

As a parting comment, Louie, you're worse than just bat shit crazy. You're a self-confessed sex offender if you're to be believed. Throw yourself on the mercy of the court. From your past public statements, you'll have no trouble getting them to give you leniency if you plead insanity.


House Science Committee Hard At Work: More Hearings on Aliens Than Climate Change (Video)


alien Milky Way

The service is no longer available so we have removed that code from The Political Carnival.

Here is the original post on FreakOutNation


Cartoons of the Day- The GOP and Area 51


Area 51

Rob Rogers


Joe Heller


Rick McKee


Video Mid Day Distraction- White House responds to Secret Service Shapeshifter conspiracy


They had me at "Zionist Cabal".

A new conspiracy video claims the Secret Service assigned a shapeshifting alien to President Obama's security detail, but the White House dismisses the claim, adding that even if they did have such a program, it would likely be cut due to the sequester.

The video's narrator claims that an agent guarding Obama during his March 4 speech to the American Israel Public Affairs Committee “could be a shapeshifter alien humanoid working for the powers that be, caught in a high-definition video during an event of the Zionist cabal.”

“I can’t confirm the claims made in this video, but any alleged program to guard the president with aliens or robots would likely have to be scaled back or eliminated in the sequester,” wrote Caitlin Hayden, chief spokeswoman for the National Security Council. “I’d refer you to the Secret Service or Area 51 for more details.”

Wired notes that this isn't an explicit denial. So maybe the conspiracy theorist is right and an "ancient extra-terrestrial race" is "pulling the strings of mankind."