Archive for 2016

Quickie: Rand Paul is "writing" a book

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quickie

Got time for another Quickie?

Via The Hill:

Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) is working on a new book slated for release next year at the same time he decides on a potential 2016 presidential bid. [...]

His office said it was still being written.

And by written, they meant plagiarized.

That was today's (second) Quickie. Was it good for you?

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Rick Perry spends thousands on Obstructive Tongue Syndrome

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obstruction, obstructive

We all know how Republicans love to obstruct. They can't help themselves, it's their one area of expertise, other than holding expensive, nasty, meaningless hearings. Their obstructive nature comes in extra crispy handy when it comes to getting absolutely nothing done in Congress instead of, you know, making this country run better. Poor Texas Gov. Rick Perry, however, has been dealt a bad obstructive hand.

In his case, the obstruction is his own tongue. He keeps tripping on it. Guess you could say his tongue got a taste of the GOP's own obstructive medicine:

oops rick perry smallerSo what's a tongue klutz to do? Well, you know what they say, money talks. In this case, Rick Perry is hoping to take that literally. Taegan over at Political Wire tells us that Perry spent $17K on speech coaches (there's a pay wall at the Houston Chronicle, so this is all I can provide). How nice for him that he's learning to speak English fluently so he can keep up with the demands his crowd places on immigrants:

One interesting item: Perry spent $17,000 for speech coaches "to smooth his public delivery after earning a reputation for tripping over his tongue during his run for the 2012 Republican presidential nod."

He also "has a campaign stockpile of $4.4 million collected for a now nonexistent re-election battle," which should come in handy. See, Gov. Ricky is adept at one thing, despite his tongue acrobatics. He's willing to share, despite his stingy inclination to post Do Not Enter signs all over Texas. Again, via Taegan:

Texas Gov. Rick Perry (R), "who's weighing a White House bid in 2016, has formed a federal political action committee to aid fellow Republican candidates in the Nov. 4 elections," Bloomberg reports.

Should be fun to watch him try to pronounce RickPAC.

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2016 "heating up like eggs on chrome bumper in Death Valley parking lot at high noon in August"

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2016 speculation jon stewart

Another snark-filled guest post by the one, the only Will Durst, who's having a little fun with incendiary partisan politics, the growing GOP vs. Dem hostilities, and possible 2016 presidential candidates. Take it away, Will:

T MINUS 28 MONTHS AND COUNTING

Bust out the gin and tonics because this is shaping up to be one heck of a long hot summer. Weather- wise and politics- wise. All over the world, hostilities are flaring like out of control wildfires. While here at home, it’s the words that have grown from fiery to scalding. And the only way to describe the actions- incendiary.

Impeachment and lawsuits and child immigration are all raging hot topics. The partisan sweltering also includes the 2016 presidential sweepstakes, which is heating up like an egg frying on a chrome bumper in a Death Valley parking lot at high noon in August.

The usual and unusual suspects on the Republican side are spending enough time at the Iowa and New Hampshire Humidity Festivals to qualify as part time mosquito repellent reps and if they aren’t, they should be, because they’re going to need all the extra money they can get. This marathon is going to be as expensive as it will be ugly. And that’s saying something.

Meanwhile, the plot thins. Paul Ryan is busy figuring out how to reinstitute debtors prison. Mike Huckabee is checking the Bible for loopholes. Marco Rubio is taking deodorant baths in order to convincingly deny climate change. In Florida.

And that Rand Paul fellow is simply a feuding fool. He finally patches up a blistering squabble with Chris Christie, then goes and starts a new one with Rick Perry that quickly heats up to Def Con 4 levels with both belligerents spitting like rudely awakened cobras. And no mongoose in sight. Sounds like he just doesn’t like governors.

All this torrid internecine warfare has led party moderates to call for Jeb Bush to get into the race. And he might, but first he has to get mom’s permission. After all, it was Barbara who astutely diagnosed the national fever known as Bush Fatigue.

If the Jeb were elected, that would make the last 5 Presidents: Bush- Clinton- Bush- Obama- Bush. Like a club sandwich. With the Bushes as the white bread. And how apropos is that? This family is whiter than Justin Beiber’s Nova Scotia Fan Club. Like cauliflower and mashed potatoes on a paper plate with a side of leeks white.

Other big money interests are running Romney up the flagpole to see if anybody salutes. But so far: not a lot of looking up. Besides, the former Governor of Massachusetts claims to have no interest. Which pretty much describes the problem with his last campaign.

On the other side, to call Hillary Clinton a prohibitive favorite for the Democrats is like implying that Shar Pei puppies are cute. She’s a virtual lock. Just like she was in 2008.

Her new book, “Hard Choices,” which sounds more like Bill’s handiwork, ends with “The time for another hard choice will come soon enough.” Hmmmm. What could she possibly be talking about there? Picking names for the new grandchild?

The biggest problem for the Democrats is a lack of Hillary alternatives. Even LeBron James has a back up. What if the former First Lady goes on the DL? Karl Rove claims her fall a couple of years ago was responsible for brain damage. And the guy who escorted Dubyah into the Oval Office should be trusted on this. He’s probably familiar with the symptoms.

Copyright ©2014, Will Durst. Will Durst is an award- winning, nationally acclaimed political comic. Go to willdurst.com to find about more about the new documentary film “3 Still Standing,” and a calendar guide to personal appearances including his new one- man show “BoomeRaging: From LSD to OMG.”
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Michele Bachmann, please proceed

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please proceed Marsha Blackburn

Bachmann 1

To quote President Obama as he watched his presidential opponent Mitt Romney commit political suicide during a debate, "Please proceed," Michele Bachmann. No seriously. Proceed. Please. This country needs a little levity. As Rachel Maddow put it in the above segment, she is the "living, breathing embodiment of the crazy in American politics. It's almost an American pastime to watch Michele Bachmann do her thing."

But Maddow also added, "She's more influential than she gets credit for... She may look like a kooky also-ran all the time, but she also has a way of saying things that stick."

Oh stop being so even-handed and astute, Rachel. You're ruining all our fun.

Via Real Clear Politics:

The Minnesota congresswoman and 2012 Republican presidential candidate told RealClearPolitics on Tuesday that she is considering a second White House run.

Bachmann made the revelation during an interview, in which she was asked for her view on whether any Republican women might seek the Oval Office in 2016.

“The only thing that the media has speculated on is that it’s going to be various men that are running,” she replied. “They haven’t speculated, for instance, that I’m going to run. What if I decide to run? And there’s a chance I could run... Like with anything else, practice makes perfect,” she said. “And I think if a person has gone through the process -- for instance, I had gone through 15 presidential debates -- it’s easy to see a person’s improvement going through that.”

There are more quotes from Bachmann at the link.

Fasten your seat belts...

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Caroline Kennedy Supports Hillary Clinton For President

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Hillary

The repost.us service is no longer available so we have removed that code from The Political Carnival.

Here is the original post on Liberaland

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Cartoons of the Day- Christie's Bridgegate Blooms

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blooms

Jimmy Margulies

Gov. Christie's Real Problem

Bruce Plante

blooms2

John Cole

blooms3

Christopher Weyant

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Cartoons of the Day- Rand Paul and Plagiarism

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paulpla2

Mike Luckovich

Clay Bennett editorial cartoon

Clay Bennett

paulpla

Joel Pett

paulpla3

David Fitzsimmons

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