Remember Turner and Hooch? Meet Gov. Ultrasound and Cooch.

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gov. ultrasound and cooch

Remember Turner and Hooch? Meet Gov. Ultrasound and Cooch.

In our last episode, we left off with reports of Va. Gov. Bob “Ultrasound” McDonnell negotiating his resignation. And Rachel Maddow pretty much destroyed him over all those pesky “gifts.”

Yet according to new Quinnipiac poll, voters say by a 44% to 36% margin that McDonnell is honest and trustworthy and only 16% of voters, most of whom are Democrats, think he should resign. I'msorrywhat?

As for Ken "Cooch" Cuccinelli, well...

Oy oy oy!

but wait there's more smaller

Jim Nolan at the Richmond Times-Dispatch just broke a new twist in Bob McDonnell corruption scandal (h/t: Rachel Maddow) to the tune of about about $2,800 per month:

Cash-strapped Gov. Bob McDonnell has found a way to defray part of his monthly real estate expenses on the millions in property he owns -- by renting his western Henrico home to his hand-picked state health commissioner.

Dr. Cynthia C. Romero, who took over as state health commissioner in January, has been renting the McDonnells' $835,000 home in the tony Wyndham residential community, a McDonnell spokesman confirmed. [...]

News that the governor entered into a financial relationship with a top state official under his supervision comes as federal and state investigators probe the gifts the first family and McDonnell have received during his time in office and his relationship with Star Scientific CEO Jonnie Williams Sr.

oh noes

Oh yesses!

but wait there's more smaller

You didn't think I'd forget about Cooch, now did you? He just can't seem to accept that oral sex thing. Think Progress:

In an unusual move, Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli II (R), his party’s nominee for governor, launched a new campaign website Wednesday highlighting his efforts to reinstate Virginia’s unconstitutional Crimes Against Nature law. The rule, which makes felons out of even consenting married couples who engage in oral or anal sex in the privacy of their own homes, was struck down by federal courts after Cuccinelli blocked efforts to bring it in line with the Supreme Court’s 2003 Lawrence v. Texas ruling.

TP has the gory details.

It gets worse. According to a Roanoke College poll, Cooch is leading Democrat Terry McAuliffe 37% to 31% in the gubernatorial race. 27% are undecided. That's two polls in one post that make me want to stick a fork in my face.

(UPDATE: Here are two polls that tell a much happier story. Forks officially removed.)

But back to how that creepy old "Big Government" should never, ever intrude upon the private lives of Americans. Except when it comes to women's privacy and reproductive rights.

Except when it comes to consenting adults engaging in the type of sex that surely makes Cooch (no pun) cry "Waaah!" and hide under the covers (along with his grown-up magazines with grown-up images... allegedly... according to me... but come on, is there any doubt? Did I just type all that out loud?).

Hey Ultrasound and Cooch, how's that GOP reinvention workin' for ya?

extreme makeover my ass

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  • Virginia Adams

    As for the 27% who remain undecided...WHAT? How can anyone not know? Oh and I presume this means that Cuccinelli never, ever
    engages in (gasp!) oral sex? Yeah, right.

  • http://FreakoutNation.com Anomaly 100

    What gets me are the people that want him to stay in office. Who ARE these people? Oh right, Republicans...