Olympic Boycott or Olympic Gaff?


Olympic Boycott

If one thing is constant, it's that Lindsay Graham doesn't have a brain. Just ask his puppet master, John McCain.Even Grandpa Grumpy is getting weary of his antics and motor mouthing on any topic at any time.

Here's his latest, according to Talking Points Memo:

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) suggested Tuesday that the United States should boycott the 2014 Winter Olympics if Russia offers asylum to National Security Agency leaker Edward Snowden.

Next year's winter games are slated to be held in Sochi, Russia.

“I would. I would just send the Russians the most unequivocal signal I could send them,” Graham told The Hill when asked about a possible boycott.

“It might help, because what they’re doing is outrageous,” Graham added. “We certainly haven’t reset our relationship with Russia in a positive way. At the end of the day, if they grant this guy asylum it’s a breach of the rule of law as we know it and is a slap in the face to the United States.”

But Graham's longtime ally on Capitol Hill, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ), didn't seem as receptive to a boycott.

Don't listen to him, Sen. Graham. You da man. You know better than Gramps. Lead us to victory...

Silly Lindsay Graham 3

You all may think this is silly, but I think Lindsay's got a valid point, one we learned during the 1980 Olympic boycott. If the US doesn't participate, the Olympics loses --a sacrifice that benefits everyone -- especially the hard working athletes who train their fanny's off to bring us national pride. Who needs more understanding and friendship through peaceful sporting events? Certainly not the United States with it's vaunted standing in the international community.

Go ahead, Lindsey, tell us again how well that boycott worked for us last time? We showed them, didn't we? It ruined the Olympics right? It caused them to go under, right? We were missed from the event, right? Has there been a successful Olympics since? No!

Or yes. Depends on who you ask. How did John McCain, your hero explain it?

“There’s many things we can do, but I think the experience of canceling the Olympics the last time around (well, actually 23 years ago and 5 Olympics later) wasn't very good,” McCain said, as quoted by The Hill.

The United States and the Soviet Union each boycotted the Olympics during the 1980s amid the Cold War. First, the U.S. boycotted the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow, prompting the U.S.S.R. to boycott the summer games in Los Angeles four years later.

If you think I'm just being snarky, sure. And I'm going to take it one more beat.

I dug a little deeper and saw that this particular proposed 2014 Winter Games boycott has special meaning for the South Carolina gentleman. He's considered an early favorite in the newest event. So his is a selfless act. He's willing to sacrifice his own personal moment in the spotlight to make a statement. And if he does, next years downhill speed deception luge event (DSDL), will never be the same. An American boycott is sure to cost us at least one medal, if not a complete sweep.

four man luge

The DSDL mixes speed with a twisting of the truth on slippery sloping track complete with dangerous hairpin turns, precipitous elevation of veracity changes and deceptive innuendo and fact-checking traps. Wipe-outs and crashes are as commonplace as a trick being turned in a Parisian whorehouse.

It is widely anticipated the US senatorial team, with none other than the South Carolina Senator as an early front runner to not only represent the US and medal, but to bring home the coveted Alfred E. Neuman, "What, Me Lie?" award for individual achievement.

Along with Lindsay Graham, the four-man US team, already training hard to represent the US include perennial crowd favorite John McCain, the wrinkly and crusty Mitch McConnell, and the elusive  John Cornyn who rumor has it, is training with personal coach and potential future teammate, Sarah Palin. Though an aging team, they believe experience can take them to the top spot on next year's winner's podium -- and I agree.

So why does Lindsey Graham want to boycott the Olympics with so much personal glory at hand? He's a team player. He's putting America first. He's going to show them Ruskies. If you can't get what you want, try to rain on their parade. That'll teach them to give asylum to someone we want.

You go, boyee.