As a child growing up in Irish Catholic Boston, it was commonplace to see a St. Christopher's medal dangling from a car's rear view mirrors or on the dashboard. After all, he's the guardian saint of transportation. All the girls' parochial schools were called St. Agnes or Our Lady of Sacred Agnes as she is the patron saint of girls. If your son was troubled or "wild", parents would light a candle to St. Patrick who would protect them from sins, snakes and witchcraft.
So in writing a post for The Political Carnival, I needed to know the name for the patron saint of Justice. Of Goodness. Of Fairness. Of Brotherhood. I looked them up and guess what? Those are not listed. I guess those traits are still available.
With all the saints they do have, these must exist but they didn't make it to the official Catholic Church Patron Saints Index. No siree, Bob.
While those topics didn't make it, there are hundreds of other that did. I'd like to share a few of the more obscure with you. Keep in mind, these must be more important than those traits I mentioned above or for certain, they'd have made this list. So in place of Fairness, brotherhood, justice goodness, I give you:
Saint Bibiana - Hangovers
Saint Fiacre - Hemorrhoids and piles
St. Katherine of Alexandria - cutlery
St. Blaise - goiters
St. Julian - wandering minstrels
St. Vidus - actors
St. George - syphilis
Those are all real, I kid you not. So I've come up with a few of my own that I'm going to submit to the Catholic board for immediate consideration.
St. Stacius Awayis - protector from tax collectors
St. Vicodin - protector from constant back pain
St. Buttocks - guardian from a pain in the a**
St. GOP - Protector of women from their rights
St. Xanax - provider of all stress relief
St. Bendover Endictus - Overseer of parochial schools
St. Palin - guardian of quitters
St. Arby's - Purveyor of Roast beef sandwiches
St. Boehner - Endower of Obstructionism
St. Yungus Boyus - Guardian of the Vienna Boys Choir
Feel free to add a few of your own. The Pope Francis's suggestion box is open and the Holy See is waiting.