If at first you don't secede, try, try a petition


Question: What do these states have in common? Texas, Louisiana, Alabama, Tennessee, Oregon (!), Kentucky, Montana, North Dakota, Mississippi, North Carolina, Florida, Georgia, New York, New Jersey, Colorado, Arkansas, South Carolina, and Missouri.

Answer: Their residents have expressed (at the very least) an interest (at the very least) in seceding from the United States. As you can see by the petitions above, thousands have signed on.

Why? Because apparently President Obama, not Willard Romney, is a poopy head. Or something.

Wait. New York? Joisey?

Texas, for one, may want to think about their Latino population, because I have a feeling they may disagree. As for the secessionists among us, how about you move to a hermetically sealed bubble far far away, since creating your own reality seems to be your ultimate goal. The rest of us are just fine where we are.

Per Gawker:

As unilateral secession was ruled unconstitutional by the Supreme Court, it remains to be seen if this movement is more than a toothless temper tantrum thrown by armchair revolutionaries.