“Last Blog Standing” starts riiight….now!
Yes, it’s time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts, too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc.
A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:
PAUL RYAN said that he and MITT ROMNEY won’t reveal their tax plan to the public until after the election. Everyone is upset. Like other politicians, couldn’t he just do the honorable thing — and lie?
A new CNN poll shows that PRESIDENT OBAMA now has a lead over ROMNEY in states like Ohio and Michigan. Looks like MITT’S “seriously mis-characterized” statement about the Middle East has back fired on him in the Mid West.
In fact, after the last ROMNEY-RYAN popularity poll, RYAN is thinking of dropping ROMNEY from the ticket.
The streets of Cairo are filled with young people rioting and flag burning. If we see someone running with a TV set on his shoulder, it will be a sure sign their democracy is working.
Los Angeles police were involved in a high-speed chase with a suspect who drew a crowd by throwing money out the window. When ROMNEY saw this he immediately called his campaign manager and his bank in Switzerland.
OBAMA visited a pizzeria is Florida and the owner gave the PRESIDENT a bear hug and lifted him off his feet. Everybody shared a good laugh including the Secret Service. Then they shot the man right in his pepperoni.
ROMNEY released an ad that features Hispanic voters speaking in Spanish. The ad ends with him saying, “I’m MITT ROMNEY and I have no idea what these people are saying.”
The United States is now number 7 in the world’s most competitive economies. Switzerland is number one. That’s why in Switzerland they eat Swiss Cheese and in this country we can only eat the holes.
ROMNEY hasn’t been campaigning much this week. They say he’s practicing for the upcoming debates. He’s trying to be succinct and concise and limit himself to only three empty promises.
In 2008 PRESIDENT OBAMA was successful with the slogan “It’s time for a change.” So much so, MITT ROMNEY is using it in this election. “It’s time for a change,” seems to be so catchy it was just picked up by “Depends” for its commercials.
With all the other things that are in the news, jobs is still the number one topic in the election. I don’t know if the economy is getting any better, but the show “Wall Street Week” was just moved from PBS to the Comedy Channel.
High gasoline prices are not only crimping consumer spending, but if it gets any worse people will not be able to afford to drive the cars they are living in.