Batten down the hatches! Hide the kids! Get outcher Glocks! The evil protesters are coming to getcha! Via TampaBay.com:
TALLAHASSEE — Fearful that protesters might storm their doors during the legislative session, the Florida Chamber of Commerce is on lockdown — hiring off-duty Tallahassee police officers to stand guard in the parking lot and establishing security codes (red, orange and yellow) so employees know the threat level.
You thought I was kidding, right? And yes, they seem to have even dragged this old relic out:
Oops, wrong chart, but you get the idea.
Meet Chamber president Mark Wilson:
“We’ve been picketed by ACORN before,” Wilson noted. “They brought people in on buses and pushed open our front door a few years ago.”
Really now? They pushed open your front door? Did you try locking it? And which front door was that? Did they come to your house? I bet they pushed real hard, huh?
And they had the money to bus people in, in real live buses? Is that right? They did that?
Wilson was feeling a tad queasy thinking about the possible repercussions from the Chamber’s support of Gov. Rick Scott and the Republican-led Legislature wanting to “cut benefits for public employees, lay off state workers and end tenure for teachers.” I’d worry, too. Those are some pretty rotten things to support.
Barney Bishop, head of Associated Industries of Florida, the state’s best-known business lobby, who hadn’t beefed up security at his offices, said this:
“I told the staff if they get any protesters to take them some bottled water and Girl Scout cookies,” Bishop said. “If they start breaking windows, we’ll call the cops, but the truth of the matter is you can’t be afraid of these people.”
Yes, it’s good to resist that pesky fear of “these people”, these very scary, threatening… teachers.
Good thing you remembered the ol’ Girl Scout cookies ploy; that’ll take the fight right out of ‘em. Without a Thin Mint or four, no telling how out of control those union thugs would become. They become absolute monsters without their fix. Monsters!
Wilson said another concern of his was the presence among the protesters of Susannah Randolph, a former ACORN organizer…
“But we have no interest in being at the chamber,” she said Thursday. “It’s hilarious that little ole me would be considered a threat.” [...]
PolitiFact Florida gave that claim its lowest rating of Pants on Fire, finding that local teachers peacefully protested outside the offices of three Central Florida lawmakers but none arrived by bus.
Ooo, busted. Now who’s gonna eat all those cookies?